Are you committed to being committed?
I got hit upside the head today for not thinking. I told my mentor that I’m trying to stay committed when it came to a new project I’m working on. As soon as I said that, I knew what was coming. Call it a Freudian Slip or just call it regression, but as soon as I said, “I’m trying to stay committed” it was over. I immediately began to backtrack…But it was too late…
My mentor was all over it.
He said, “Oh you’re TRYING to be committed? How’s that working out for you JL?” Then he started laughing like, “Are you kidding me?” You know we don’t play that “Try” stuff.
Yup…I knew it..What was I thinking?
It’s simple… I wasn’t…
Maybe you’ve set your heart on a goal. Maybe you’ve taken the step to go after your first real estate deal. If so, that’s great. However, I have an important question for you…
How deep is your commitment?
- If you are struggling with staying comitted to your goals…
- If you’re someone who starts things and doesn’t finish them…
- If you make excuses for why you haven’t reached your goals…
Then there is only one word that gets down to the root of all these problems:
Accountability!
You have to hold yourself accountable when it comes to going after your goals.
When I said, “I’m trying to stay committed” I was basically telling myself that I might not stay committed. I was indirectly telling myself that as soon as there is a reason to back out…I’m done! Eventually I would accept failure…
Do you think I’m being too hard on myself? Not me…
If you’ve been keeping up with my posts or even been over to my blog, then you should know by now that it took me 2 Years (730 Days) to complete my first real estate deal.
One of the reasons I mentioned was because of “Paralysis of Analysis”. That was huge! However, the other reason was because I wasn’t holding myself accountable and I was just giving real estate investing a try.
Whenever someone fails at anything…What is the first thing they say?
I Tried…
I Tried My Best…
Some will even take it as far as saying, “I tried my best and that’s all that matters”
Really? Did you really try your best? So there isn’t anything else that you could have done? (This is what I had to ask myself as well)
Here is what I’d like you to commit yourself to right now:
Get the word “try” out of your vocabulary. Start telling yourself that you WILL do what you say you’ll do. When I was in the military, I didn’t really have choices. If I had a mission to accomplish, I had to do what I had to do. There was no way I was going to stand in front of my commander and tell him…”Well, sir the mission was a failure…We tried and just couldn’t succeed…We did our best though” That was just not going to happen.
Trying is just not good enough.
I can’t imagine providing for my family, then something catastrophic happens, and I say, “Honey..Kids…I tried my best”
I think you see where I’m going with this.
You have to take TRY out of your vocabulary because you are basically admitting defeat! Maybe not right at that second, but possibly in the near future.
I’ll give it a try (Translates to, If somehow this doesn’t work…I’m done!)
Get out of your way when it comes to success and make it happen!
Two quick ways to be accountable?
- Give yourself strong reasons WHY you’re doing what you’re doing.
If you don’t have a reason to do it, then you probably shouldn’t be doing it. Every time you feel like you’re going to give up, review your reasons why. Go over it in your head and let it sink in!
- Reach out to your accountability partners.
My mentor is someone that always keeps me accountable. My kids keep me accountable too. lol (Daddy you said this…Daddy you said that…) I’ve said it many times and this won’t be the last, but connect with like minded people, build a relationship, and help each other stay accountable to whatever goals you set. Shae Bynes wrote a great post on the competitive disadvantage of not having Accountability Partners.
Like the commercial says, Just DO IT!
To Our Success,
J. Lamar Ferren
Ps. What are some ways that you keep yourself accountable? If you’re not keeping yourself accountable, what do you think is holding you back?
Photo: Zach Klein
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Article Author: J. Lamar FerrenJ. Lamar has written 40 articles for us.
Visit J. Lamar's Website: http://www.jlamarferren.com/
J. Lamar Ferren is a 26 year old New Breed Real Estate Investor who takes down deals nationwide. Through direct response marketing he uses creative and outside the box methods, both online and offline to attract buyers, sellers, and investors.
Joshua Dorkin
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
JL,
A timely article, as you touched on a bunch of things that are very relevant to me right now.
It has taken me a while to figure out what keeps me accountable. In fact, I think that it is still a work in progress for me.
However, one thing recently that I have discovered about myself that keeps me accountable is….
‘Not having regrets’.
If I set my sights on achieving a goal, I will follow through and ensure it’s completion. As I do not want to have regrets of giving up on the goal.
Some of my thoughts…
I would be interested to hear from others the different things that keep them accountable…
Regards,
Neil.
.-= Neil Uttamsingh´s last blog ..A message from the author =-.
Not having regrets is a good one Neil. I no longer want to put myself in a position where I’m saying, I should have done this and I should have done that…
Very interesting post. I think commitment is not only a question of accountability; furthermore one needs to accept the fact that not circumstance determines our success; it’s ourselves and our actions. By blaming others we just give up our sense of responsibility and (therefore) accountability.
.-= Chris´s last blog ..Land #1: Contract to buy =-.
Chris you definitely touched on a big one. That was another thing I used to do and as I pointed at others in the end it all came back to me. My life is my responsibility and your life is your responsibility. Take Charge!
.-= J. Lamar Ferren´s last blog ..(Part 2) Warning: Don’t spend another Dime with Google until you see this… =-.
Great article, J.
I don’t think you’re being too hard on yourself at all, and I agree that “trying” to do anything is simply not good enough. Either do it, or don’t do it, but saying that you’re going to try is just setting yourself up for failure.
Regarding the accountability partner- I have had one for going on a year now, and it has helped me out tremendously in the productivity dept. We have a wiki page set up that we both go to every morning and write down our goals for the day, and then check each one off as we accomplish it.
Having someone there looking over your shoulder definitely gives you an extra boost of motivation to get things done.
Steph
.-= Stephani´s last blog ..Saturday Night Reader Mail: Which Contracts Do You Use When Wholesaling an REO? =-.
I like the method you and your accountability partner use Steph. If you have someone who is on the same page with you and is as determined as you are to succeed, you’ll always get there much faster. I’m going to look into that wiki method.
.-= J. Lamar Ferren´s last blog ..(Part 2) Warning: Don’t spend another Dime with Google until you see this… =-.
JL,
1) What is wiki? (wikipedia?)
2) What methods are people taking to link up with accountability partners? I currently don’t have one, but think that it is a great idea. I would be interested to hear from those people that have them, and how they came about being matched up with that person…
Regards,
Neil.
.-= Neil Uttamsingh´s last blog ..A message from the author =-.
Hey Neil,
For my accountability partner, I chose a like-minded friend. He lives several hundred miles away from me and is not focused on real estate investing, but we’re of like mind for sure. We’ve been accountability partners for nearly a year now and its been VERY helpful.
.-= Shae Bynes´s last blog ..Tire kicker Tuesday =-.
This was a great post, J. Lamar (and thanks for the shoutout)! I laughed at the comment about your kids holding you accountable. That is soooo true! I’m always telling my daughter “stop trying to put me in a contract!” because I know that if I say something or give her a definitive answer to her persistent questions, she WILL hold me to it. Period.
Anyway, I digress. Good lessons in here.
.-= Shae Bynes´s last blog ..Go-Givers Sell More: An awesome follow up to The Go-Giver =-.
lol Thanks Shae. As they say, you can learn a lot from kids. :0)
.-= J. Lamar Ferren´s last blog ..(Part 2) Warning: Don’t spend another Dime with Google until you see this… =-.