How To Silence Self-Doubt When Getting Started in Real Estate
“Do you have what it takes?” “Are you good enough?” “Can you really do what those other people have done?”
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These are questions that the sneaky little voice in our head just loves torturing us with when trying something new.
Anytime there is a learning curve or a time when we must leave our comfortable little nest, the questions about our own ability start pestering us.
How can we get these voices to just shut up? What can we do to overcome the self doubt? What’s with all of the questions? How about some answers. We’ll get to that.
How I’ve Been Dealing With My Own Self-Doubt
Recently, I’ve been reminded of what it is like to face these questions. Last week, I hosted my first webinar about a wholesale flip that I recently completed. When I first thought of doing the webinar, I was super excited to be able to share the experience with others. This was going to be great. All that was needed were some details, pictures, slides, a webinar service and an audience. Check, check, check, check and …
Oh yeah, I need an audience. What if nobody is interested? Even worse, what if a lot of people are interested? People are actually going to be listening to me speak. I could really screw up big time.
Suddenly, the fear swept in. Could I really do this? Will I stand up to speak and have my brain sit back down?
We Only Grow Outside Our Comfort Zone
I went back and forth on whether I really wanted to do this. It would be easier to just forget the whole thing and write a blog post explaining the deal. But, it would be especially beneficial to everyone if I could show them and discuss the deal. Live questions and answers would be a huge help in explaining everything.
The email announcing the event was quickly typed up with enthusiasm. Then came the moment of truth. The ‘send’ button needed to be pressed. Some more hesitation…
Ultimately, the reasons I came up with for doing the webinar allowed me to force my self out of my comfort zone. I hit the ‘send’ button and announced my intentions. This allowed me the chance to grow. Now I HAD to do it. No backing out now. I just pushed myself in the water.
With Strong Enough Reasons We Can Push Through
If you don’t know why you are doing something, I mean REALLY why, it will be hard to push through the stress and uncertainty of doing that thing. It seems like I’ve been harping on this over the course of several posts. It’s because I feel it is the most important of all aspects of getting started. The foundation needs to be strong.
Understand why you want start flipping houses and use that as a constant reminder when things get tough and the doubt creeps in. My recommended method of figuring this out is to sit and write down all the things you want. It’s important to ignore whether you think you ever may actually achieve or receive any of these things. Just write them down as they pop into your head. You should be writing down not only things, but accomplishments you want to achieve, places you want to travel, people you want meet, the person you want to become, the life you want to live, and anything else that you feel will make you happy. If you list things like ‘make a million dollars’, go back and try to figure out ‘why’ you want to make a millions dollars. If you put down, ‘to live in a million dollar house’, try to figure out why you want to live in a million dollar house. The reasoning behind wanting these things will be a far greater pull for you than the things themselves.
Make A Commitment, No Matter How Small
Tired of sitting on the sidelines? Make a commitment. It doesn’t have to be huge and you don’t have to have it all figured it out for every possible outcome. That’s impossible. A trek of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
This reminds me of what it was like to put out my first marketing, advertising that I buy houses. This commitment was going to result in people calling me and having to figure out how to handle whatever may happen. There was no way I was ever going to know how to answer all of the infinite questions that could have been asked. I didn’t even know what to expect.
But, this was the quickest way to find out what I needed to know. Have them call and start asking me questions. Take action and learn what it really takes and find out that it really isn’t that hard.
Incidentally, when the phone rang for the first time with an unfamiliar number, I tensed up and lost my nerve. My wife was looking at me wondering when I was finally going to pick up. Without thinking about it, I tossed the phone to her (she’d probably say, ‘it was more like threw at her’).
There you have it. The real story. My wife took our first ever call from a motivated seller. She did a mighty fine job to boot. I’m sure we had to call the seller back to answer questions we forgot to ask in the initial call but we sure learned a lot.
Silence That Voice For Good
Don’t let that voice keep you from taking action. Stop listening to the self doubt propaganda. We all have what it takes and it’s just a matter of digging deep and realizing it.
Figure out why you want to flip houses and start making some small (or large – go BIG) commitments and find out how possible it really is.
The webinar went well. I was unbelievably nervous and had a hard time spitting out my words for the first couple minutes but soon relaxed and had a blast. Many people expressed a lot of gratitude for what I shared and it made it all worth while. I’m sure the next one will be a lot less nerve racking now that I’ve ignored the voice of self doubt and just did it.
I hope you do same.
Photo: Alex Proimos