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Posted over 14 years ago

How to FAIL at Social Networking

I just got a request to close the account of a member here on BiggerPockets.  While this doesn't happen very often, when it does, there is always a common theme.  In EVERY case, the person was unsatisfied in some way with the results of their networking.  The same goes for today.  This person had three posts on the site, all of which were solicitations in a group, seeking buyers for property.  Otherwise, they were not active on the forums, blogs, or any other place on the site.

The reason they were unsatisfied is that they expected the site to magically produce for them connections without doing the work. The did nothing to build relationships, and did nothing to be seen and known by the community at large.

We can't do the work for you.  If you want to succeed at social networking for real estate, you MUST pay attention to the following information:

You Will Never Succeed in Social Networking if you Don't Build Relationships!

Almost nine out of ten people who are unhappy with the results of their efforts on our social network do nothing but solicit deals.  The other one out of ten simply create a profile and expect people to come flocking to them.

Social Networking Requires You to Be Active and Visible.  Here are some tips:

  • You will not make friends by joining a social network and immediately solicit business. 
  • You will not do deals by joining a social network and immediately solicit business.
  • You MUST interact and give people the opportunity to get to know you before soliciting business!  There are many ways to do that here on BP - forums, blogs, bulletins, etc.
  • People will NOT just seek you out unless you are visible.  To be visible, you MUST create a complete profile.  You MUST also become part of the VISIBLE conversation happening on the site. 
  • The most important key to success is to focus on establishing relationships! For more, read "Are You Wasting Your Time with Social Networking for Real Estate?"

I've talked about all of this on many occassions.  I think people have the false impression that people will just flock to you once you create a profile somewhere online.  There is nothing farther from the truth.  Being successful on a social network requires time and effort.  Those people who are generally the most successful on any network are those people who are focused; those who are a part of the visible ether. 

So . . . if you want to fail at social networking, create a profile and disapear.  You'll have no one to blame for your failure but yourself.


Comments (50)

  1. I just saw this, but agree 100%. I'm not a social networking genius, or even done a deal yet, but I know from life and work experiences that relationships are everything in business, if you're trying to do it the RIGHT WAY, and build something credible and sustainable. Thanks for putting this stuff out there. Sell sell sell just doesn't work in most business that require human interaction. People are looking for someone to trust, someone to like. Be that person, and the sales will come.


    1. Yep. Well put, Shane.


  2. So many common sense points...I believe sometime other cultures have it together more than we do. They get to know each other...spending TIME not marketing and then voila...it will happen when relationships is what makes it happen not posting properties...tks so much for the comments...it really help me also.


    1. No problem. Thanks for the comment, Jerry.


  3. Awesome blog. You would think people already know this. I guess common sense is not that common.


  4. I am new to social networking. I have found that writing blogs that are based on my expertise helps others understand my product. I don't require them to buy from me to learn the mysterious and magical solution to their problem. I give them as much info as I can communicate in the blog and they either buy from me and they are informed or they ask better questions from someone when they buy from them. Either way, everyone is winning and there is enough business out there for all of us.


  5. I must admit, it is the best way to keep the old mind sharp, even for us old timers that just cant seem to grasp all the nuiances of these new fangled things that just seem to appear out of nowhere to us.


  6. Well, to be honest with you, I just learned something new by reading this thread. I'm new to doing business online, and those I've listened to who have given the advice of: "join twitter, join facebook, join this thing or that thing", have never given a warning about "just signing up". Honestly, when you have never done business online before, you can't be expected to just know this stuff. But it makes sense - build relationships - Duh! When I think about it, it's a no-brainer! Thanks everyone and I'm looking forward to getting to know you :)


  7. It takes time to do the social networking but, it is a critical piece to do and i plan on doing more and more in the near future. Thanks for the info Joshua.


  8. Sure, we all want to increase our business and put our name out there, but to me it is a turn off when someone doesnt want to take the time to actually have a conversation. Once they use their "one liner", they seem to suddenly have to rush out of my office. Their material goes straight in the "in case of emergency" folder. I think it takes a different kind of individual to work in our industry. I think most of us, who give a hoot, enjoy coming on hear just to learn something, just to debate something, just to help someone else's problem become a little less stressful and of course, just to meet other people that speak our language and to hopefully develop a friendly relationship with everyone. Great Blog! Thanks for the pointers and advice everyone! It's always nice to know what not to do or to do to achieve success in business and relationships.


  9. It takes a long time to build solid relationships, our group is always working on a win win situation with people. I think this is one of the best informed sites out there right now for investors. It's a wealth of information and if your going to be in this business you need be involved with everything it has to offer.


  10. What you said is very true, That is why the successful are very few.


  11. It is amazing some people just post links without helping others, teaching, and/or being taught. Great post. I suppose a lot of people do not realize the power of social media. "Hello... now buy my crap!" LOL


  12. It is amazing that relationship building must be said! "Hello... now buy my crap!" LOL


  13. Good advice Josh. Thanks for posting, I think it will help me out in my networking.


  14. Congrats! You're far from the only one closing deals thanks to BP. These things are happening regularly! The beauty of engaging with others is it provides you with the opportunity to do business. That's why we're all in real estate, right? Thanks for your comments!


  15. Who was this guy, lets string him up!


  16. Real good stuff Josh as usual. I need to learn to comment more and not be such a lurker. I have closed a deal because of this site. Thank you Jon Holdman.


  17. No problem, Brian. Jump in and participate and you'll see the results. BTW - go to the dashboard to get that avatar of yours updated with a personal photo so we can better recognize you as you travel the site.


  18. Its ironic that I realized I needed to start taking a more active role in the social networking front shortly after I read your blog. You couldn't have said it any better! Everything in life takes effort!


  19. You got it, Roger! Thanks for interacting. I hope we'll see more of you here on the blogs and forums.


  20. Like anything in life you get out what you put in THAT SIMPLE THE END.


  21. Tough love my friend, tough love


  22. @Nick - Damn skippy!


  23. I want my account closed! this site has done nothing for me :( I'm outa here mister LOL!!!! I better quit being lazy and write a testimonial myself


  24. Awesome, Christopher! Please be sure to write us a testimonial that we can use to share with other potential new members. You and everyone else on the site can do that by going to the DASHBOARD and clicking the testimonial link on the left of the page. All my best!


  25. I'm glad that I signed up for BP. I almost didn't. Already I have talked to several other members here and so far EVERYONE has been extremely helpful!


  26. Wow - another request to close an account: "Your site isn't working for me" . . . they had a profile saying they were a real estate investor and nothing else - they had no forum, blog, or other posts, zero friend requests, and did nothing to engage or participate. IF YOU WANT TO FAIL AT SOCIAL NETWORKING, CREATE A PROFILE AND EXPECT IT TO DO THE WORK FOR YOU! If you want to SUCCEED, get active; get out there; network; be part of the conversation!


  27. Thanks for the post:)


  28. Dead on, Iman!


  29. You don't get married after the first date. So why should social networking be any different? People miss the boat that online it takes more time to build that ever encompassing trust factor. Offer value whether it be big or small, and people will come to see you as someone they like and trust. Remember, keep it real as they say.


  30. Although, I feel like I might struggle a bit fitting in because I really don't have a lot of experience in Real Estate. My main roll at this point is simply moving properties by hooking up the buyer with the seller. I am not familiar with a lot of the lingo BUT I plan on building my knowledge base for sure!


  31. That's what I like to hear, Kenny!


  32. I have definitely learned that who you align yourself with makes all the difference in the world. One trait that I've grown to share and admire in the people that I am connected to now is that they are not driven my the dollar but for helping others reach their goals right along with them!! If BP has people like that then I will be a permanent fixture!


  33. Will, I'm opening an SDIRA account with Equity Trust, which you greatly influenced. Thanks!


  34. Jon, You are one of the active members on this site, building relationships (with me included) and I don't see any reason why you would not do business with someone here on BP soon, heck, it may be with me!


  35. I've got a few, but I'm waiting for them to become more seasoned!


  36. Jon - I agree . . . it is just a matter of time. You're very visible on the site, and have earned your stripes. I can't wait to hear the success stories!


  37. I have yet to do business with anyone on BP, yet, but that's just a matter of time. However, just meeting with Rich Weese for a couple of hours when he was in town was worth an incalcuable amount. Not to mention all I've learned on the forums, blogs, articles, and bulletins. Thanks for the advice, which I sum up as Get Engaged and Give as well as receive.



  38. Thanks, Doug. @Kenny - I'm glad you didn't become that person! It is very easy to just sell, sell, sell, and that works to a small degree. The true success, you'll see, comes with connection.


  39. Hello everyone...I was almost that person! The one that is new to utilizing the internet to help generate leads thinking it's going to be easy with little effort! After reading a few posts I got juiced up because I actually have what people are looking for and I never thought once to get to know someone before putting what I have out there. Now after reading this I realize I could be mistaken! I just figured I would spend the time to get to know the ones that contact me interested in what I have to offer. It makes since to initate building a relationship before hand! Thanks for the advice!


  40. Well, you gained me. +1 from the AgentGenius.com blog


  41. Aside from social networking, the information here is invaluable and inspiring. This site is a treasure chest of information and if somebody jumps in and out without combing the archives, they have missed out.


  42. @Billie - Agreed @Marc - That's what I'm saying! @Nick - Always hijacking . . . it is your birthday, so I'll let it pass ;) Nahh . . . that was an important experiment that you conducted. Most people online have no clue with they are doing in terms of social networking. I wish they could just read this and other posts like it - it isn't hard to be successful in social media . . . takes a few minutes of reading to learn the basics and viola!


  43. Josh, I don't mean to hijack this blog but I just remembered that this is exactly why I did a little experiment that I posted about in the forums about actually calling people that were on my colleague list here on BP. Out of the dozen that I called, only a few answered. Those that answered I spent at least an hour with them on the phone really connecting with them! It was great! I can't wait to do it again.


  44. It's all about connecting in a "meaningful" manner, creating and developing relationships. Any REAL relationship takes time and effort. Some folks are just plain lazy........


  45. ** I meant "online behavior" not "one behavior"


  46. Here Here! I get so many clients who say "I have a blog, Twitter account, etc. and I am not generating leads." Once I review their one behavior and relationships it is easy to show them (most of the time) where they have gone wrong. People hear what they NEED to do but not HOW to do it. Billie Hillier Practical Real Estate Marketing


  47. Chances are that person will never succeed at anything they do.