The (Lost) Art of Negotiation

I grew up on my grandparents working cattle ranch, and as such I spent a lot of time at livestock auctions and listening to my grandfather negotiate with other farmers and ranchers for everything from breeding rights and cattle prices to price of grain and hay. My grandpa was a natural, he would negotiate everywhere he went; I even once saw him ask the cashier at Wal-Mart, what kind of discount he could get.Of course he didn’t get a discount at Wal-Mart, but the point is he would never pay full price without at least asking for a lower price.

Fast forward a couple of decades, sadly my grandpa has passed, but the negotiation skills he taught me are still there, if somewhat rusty.I (like most people) don’t try to negotiate price of many things that probably could be.I have found, in starting my own Real Estate business, that I have begun negotiating more things.I have realized what my grandpa must have known.The worst thing that can happen is to hear “No.”The seller (of whatever good or service) won’t hate me because I asked; they (usually) won’t take offence, and the world won’t end because I tried to avoid paying full retail.Sometimes they will even accept my offer, or wait for it, shocker, they COUNTER my offer.It seems simple I know, but so many people are afraid to even ask.The fear of rejection, really can make the difference between making a great deal and being an average consumer.

It occurs to me that many people didn’t have the beneficial early education in this art that I had; they never learned the intricate dance so to speak.I never really sat down with my grandpa and established rules with him; I just picked up on nuances of things he did and how he spoke.These are the tips I can offer:

• 1.Never ask how much do you want or any variation of this phrase.This immediately puts the seller in a position of control, and control is one of the most important aspects of negotiation.Instead start with half as much as you want to pay, this open negotiations, and the seller can tell you if they can do it or not.Now I know you may be thinking if I offer half of what I want to pay, it will offend the seller.This is generally not true, seller’s want to sell or they wouldn’t have invited you to talk to them, and by offering half of what you want to spend you have lots of haggle room.
• 2.Establish an absolute max cap that you are willing to pay.Do not get “Bid Fever” which is to say don’t get caught in the moment.Anyone who has been to an auction or watched an auction TV show has seen someone fall victim to bid fever, and they always end up over paying for the item they are bidding on.It is a natural emotion, it awakens our competitive drive and we not only want to win, but beat the other guy.This competitive drive needs to be suppressed during negotiations or emotional offers will be made instead of educated offers.
• 3.Be WILLING TO WALK AWAY. If an agreement can’t be reached that works for both parties, you must be willing to drop the negotiations.Don’t try and make a deal where there is no deal.
• 4.Be confident not cocky when talking to the seller.Confidence instills trust in the seller while a cocky attitude will strengthen the competitive drive in the seller.
• 5.Maintain eye contact.Again by keeping eye contact people naturally will put more trust in you, and will motivate them to accept your offer.
• 6.Try and maintain the same height and posture as the seller.Be a mirror.If they are sitting, you should be sitting, if they are standing, you should be standing, etc.
• 7.Don’t be too quick to counter-offer.Take a moment to consider the seller’s offer before you counter.
• 8.PRACTICE! Always be practicing your negotiation skills.Role play with your spouse or colleagues.Ask for a discount when buying something.However you want to do it, just practice
• 9.Finally don’t be afraid of Rejection.No doesn’t hurt.It isn’t personal, just business.No is just an opportunity to practice more.

I’m sure I’m forgetting some things, but I hope this helps establish some rules in this (Lost) Art of Negotiation.If there is any tips you might have to share please leave comments.