Is it wrong to buy a house my mother got denied for?

21 Replies

My brother/agent flipped a house and it looks great. After running some numbers I think it would be a great investment. The only problem is my mother was in the process of buying it and unfortunately a week before closing the bank denied her. Now my brother/agent asked if I was interested  and I am but I feel as if that could rub my mother the wrong way since a would buy the house she wanted and rented it out to somebody else, especially since she has been living in the bad side of the city . I would love to buy it for her but then it would not be a great investment. Unfortunately I don’t have enough of a portfolio where this would actually work.

Well, look at this way: would your mother rather you have a great investment, or someone else have a great investment? If she'd rather someone else have a great investment, it doesn't say much for her as a mother, and if she'd rather you have a great investment, then how could she object? 

On a side note: whose problem is it that she couldn't get approved for a bank loan?

@Jorge Morales   denied a mortgage then you and your brother should talk to her. He is her real estate agent, did he not advise her to get pre-approved?    I think there is the possibility for bad feelings all around in this deal. You  should be upfront that your brother offered you the house and you would qualify and flip it and how does she feel about that?   If it is a buy and hold you may have more resentment because you need to be clear that you would not rent to her (I am assuming it's too expensive for her after rehab).   I would not let money rule this one because this is someone you are close to. However I am seeing it through the lens of my relationships with family.  She may be fine with it but you have to bring it to the table and we don't know your mom so you asking tells me you suspect an issue. 

@JD Martin Gave you some good advice. Talk it over with mom. She should be understanding. If she’s not understanding then it might be Difficult to make mama happy no matter what you did in life. As far as one poster above mentioning rent2own to mama or sell on a wrap to mama…I highly disagree. What would you do if mama stopped  paying? How would you feel evicting  or foreclosing on mama?

Originally posted by @Joe S. :

@JD Martin Gave you some good advice. Talk it over with mom. She should be understanding. If she’s not understanding then it might be Difficult to make mama happy no matter what you did in life. As far as one poster above mentioning rent2own to mama or sell on a wrap to mama…I highly disagree. What would you do if mama stopped  paying? How would you feel evicting  or foreclosing on mama?

 He said he wanted to buy it for her anyways. Doing it on a rent to own or a wrap instead of just buying it for her gives him the ability to show that process as net zero to lenders in the future and not impact his future lendability. Just buying a house for mom is only going to show as a liability...

I have family members I would not be tied to financially, I have others where it would be and has not been a problem. Only OP knows his family dynamic and if they are family that can handle financial interconnections or not.

Could you or your brother cosign for her? If my mom lived in a bad part of town, I would figure out how to help her as a priority over snatching her dream home for an investment. I would stay away from the property so you don't create bad feelings. You only have one mom, but there are thousands of deals...

Hi Jorge,

Why not just call her on the phone and ask her (???)

And then invite her over for a nice home cooked Dinner with all the trimmings.

Even if she says no--just because she is your Mom.

And get her a nice little gift--all wrapped up--maybe some perfume--she would like that.

Then maybe you can sit and watch a movie together--she would probably like that too.

And I know she doesn't come over to your house enough, because if she did--you would not have to ask this on a forum.

Just My 2 cents.

@Jorge Morales   also the fact your brother is the agent is an issue.   He really wants this deal to happen or he would not have offered it to you.  I would explore his agenda before talking to your mom.  I keep asking myself why would he be showing your mom houses as an agent without a good idea she could get a loan. 

Sorry for any confusion but my mother did get pre approved, something happened a week prior to closing and that’s when she was denied. Which is why its a tough decision, If she wasn’t a week away from closing or just got denied in the beginning of the process I wouldn’t think twice about this deal. I did talk to her about it and of course she told me to buy it if I want it, or possibly rent it to her but I don’t want to mix family and business also  I feel the rent would be a little over her budget which will put me in a hole. So my only options are to rent the house she was a week away from buying and renting to someone else or just walk away.

@Jorge Morales

Hi Jorge, on your original post you stated that your brother flipped the house right? So is the current owner? If that is the case then she cannot be mad at your unless she is also mad at your brother.

But to answer your question it is not wrong for you to buy it since if you don't someone else will anyway.

But dude...

what does this have to do with marketing though. This is the marketing group.

second... you are asking mother-son relationship advise on a real estate investing forum.

Look man I know I look like a prick in your eyes for doing this..

But see it my way. I am here legitimately to help people succeed. Give good advise because (almost) every damn marketer on here stinks like monkey butthole.  It makes it really difficult for me to provide value to others as a successful marketer when people ask questions about an ugly sofa and what to do with it ... or mom son dynamics.

Now to prove to you I am not a total scumbag,

I too will offer you my 2 cents... but again, don't put these questions here.

Here are my 2 cents.

NO ONE on this forum can give you advise on this issue because NO ONE on this forum remotely understands your personal dynamics with your mom. Remember this. If all fails, you can never go wrong with honesty and transparency. Tell mom the entire story.. Que sera , sera my man.

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