Thank God! The banks are recovering!
We should be happy for them….no, we should go up and kiss them on their sliding glass doors. We should send boxes of sweets to the executives who run the big banks. God bless them. They came through this economic mess just fine, thank you! Kiss, kiss Pop the cork. Down the booze. Light the cigars. Jump up and down. Shout from the rooftops. Beat the drums. Thank God! The banks are recovering! Say Amen. Can’t hear ya brother, sister…a little louder please…that’s it. Now the bankers on Wall Street can hear how truly happy we all are for them. Hell, give them even bigger bonuses. My God they deserve it. Thank God! The banks are recovering. Say Amen.
Oh. I’m sorry. What’s that you say? “What about us? Why aren’t WE recovering?” And you, over there….yes, YOU! …mind if I restate your question so all can hear? Thanks. The gentlemen in the blue cargo pants back there wants to know how come the big banks are recovering but are still not really freeing up any credit…and how come if the big banks are recovering, housing still is not, according to the latest NAHB/Wells Fargo Housing Market index for this month–the fifth month in a row for bad housing news?
Well, you know, good questions, all. Smart. To the point. Thanks for asking. Anyone here have an answer for the gentlemen? No? Not sure? Too shy to speak up?
Look. Barclays says it had a strong start for 2009. God bless Barclays. Say Amen. And, the Bank of America and JPMorgan and even Citigroup…yes, even the pathetic Citigroup, say they’re doing better as well. God bless Bank of America and JPMorgan and, yes, even Citigroup. Say Amen.
Money may not be flowing out of these banks to people who want to buy homes…or, for that matter…people who would just like to continue to pay for the homes they already have, but money sure has been flowing into the banks. A billion here, a billion there, who can keep count? What’s the difference. So long as the banks are recovering. Say Amen.
Of course, the banks are getting so much money now coming in, they even had to hide some of their revenue streams so as not to upset all the rest of us. Turns out that not only were tax dollars going directly to bail out the biggest of banks, but tax money given to bail out A.I.G was actually, in many, many cases, funneled right back to some of those big and troubled banks to make sure they recover. You know you gotta say Amen to that, don’t you?
Just got an email question from a lady in Miami. She wants to know at what point do the banks recover enough to begin helping all of us recover? Well, Mrs. Whitehead, we’re not there yet. May not be for, oh, another 5 years. But the man at the top (no, not God. President Obama—same thing???) says he is going to push and press and pound and twist and pull and tear and bang on the now recovering banks in order to get them to give up the ghost..or, in this case, the money, so that people can pay their mortgages and other people can buy new homes.
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says the rest of us will probably see a recovery begin next year! Of course, a few months ago, Ben Bernanke said things wouldn’t get much worse. So big freaking deal. No one is perfect. So, he missed it by a few thousand miles! The banks are still recovering. Say Amen.
Photo Credit: roblisameehan