You should own nothing, but control everything. 

We had to leave the game, and I ended up working at the house until 3am to get things under control.

The big chains want full control of the building process and the specs.Once fully developed, the developer wants to cash out and go build another one.

The under 5 units does not have such issues if using Fannie/Freddie financing.  80% LTV, better projected cap rates on properties that investors are purchasing (non investment home purchases typically would have poor cap rate if used as a rental).In Ca MF (assuming not a new build) is rent controlled.  

And remotely play annoying music all day/night out of their control or something to suggest they leave...? 

Now I focus in my own back yard where I have more control, and it has worked much better. 

That way you have control over who lives there, and can quickly remove anyone who is causing trouble.

Never buy a property that sits next to a school, a busy street, a retail plaza, a church, a high rise apartment complex, etc.There are a lot of things within your control when you buy a deal.

To me your post sounded like 50% sales pitch and 50% damage control.

Fannie/Freddie issued note guidance that clarified that you *can* STR your vacation home as long as you use it a certain amount of time yourself and self-manage (not give primary control to a property management company, which doesn't mean you can't use a PM at all only that they can't have control over renting out the property).