3 Ways to Strengthen Your "Naysayer" Armor

One of the hardest things we face as human-beings is ward off the opinions of others. We're victims of social pressure every day. From beauty ads, to exercise magazines, everyone has an opinion on what you "should do". This is especially true when it comes to real estate investing.

I recently ran into this scenario when a family member and I had a discussion about REI. He had fallen into being a landlord on a couple of properties over the years and has had some very bad experiences. The funny thing about bad experiences is that people tend to not look in the mirror and see that those experiences could have been vastly different had a little research been done and wiser decisions been made. But such is the human ego. Naysayers often rely on these negative experiences to justify their lack of initiative to move forward. Would you stop trying to find the love of your life if you got rejected one or two times? I would argue no.

None the less, this is the mindset of a naysayer. They will promptly tell you why your ideas and goals are "not achievable" or "too much work" or a "waste of time" because they have had a bad experience or have seen others have bad experiences. This can take a toll on your investment mindset and attitude and if you're not careful it can lead to indecision or giving up going after your goals.

So here are 3 ways you can put on some serious anti-naysayer armor and shield yourself from the REI negativity monsters.

1. Surround yourself with positive, like-minded individuals.

There’s an old saying: “you are what you eat”. Now, I’m not saying you should go and start munching on baseboards of your new rental property, or eat other investors (that’s illegal). What I am saying is that as humans we tend to behave in a way that mirrors our most frequent social interactions. We all remember the “clicks” in high school.

The same goes for investing.If you surround yourself with like-minded individuals who bring a positive vibe to what you’re trying to accomplish, then you will remain excited and refreshed on a regular basis.It will help build the confidence you need to take that leap into a new rental market, or give you that nudge to try a different type of investing. Like-minded friends and colleagues are a powerful tool in your anti-naysayer arsenal.

2. Stop trying to convert people to your investment religion.

When the naysayer monster rears their ugly face, they often come with an emotional wall that is built upon the bad experiences they’ve had. Penetrating that wall can be difficult. I have been guilty many times of trying to force my investment mindset on other people. It’s natural to want to give advice, especially when you’re excited! The problem is, not everyone is going to agree with you and trying to convert them will often times just reinforce their bad experience defenses. This is double edged sword because not only is it frustrating when someone doesn’t see things your way, but trying to convince someone of something they don’t agree with will many times turn into a challenge for them to convert you! This is when the “what about the terror tenants?” or “one miscalculation and you’re screwed” comments arise. This can become extremely detrimental and can lead to you leaving the conversation disheartened and leery of your of decisions. So when you see the naysayer monster begin to fortify their emotional wall, back away, the battle is not worth it.

3.Confront the things that scare the crap out of you.

I remember when I first got into real estate.I had many grandiose ideas and dreams that spawned from the concept of financial freedom.The only problem was that I was scared. When I say I was scared, I mean I was scared to the point where calling to talk to a real estate agent was a sweaty, stuttering ordeal. I was afraid to look like a fool, and because of that, I missed a lot of opportunity initially. Now I am passed that but only because I took the leap and faced my fears. I may have had to breathe into a paper bag afterwards but nonetheless I made it through the situation and came out stronger and wiser on the other end. Not only was I stronger, but I was stoked from what I just did! Sometimes it’s the small steps that we take that can bound us over the next obstacle. Just like building muscle, we need to put ourselves in uncomfortable situations in order to grow. So, make it a goal to once a week, put yourself in a not-so-comfortable position that in the end will make you stronger. Once you make this a habit, the naysayer’s negativity cannons will begin to have less and less of bringing you down.

Everyone has dreams.Don’t let the naysayers pierce your armor and hinder your progress towards creating what you want in life. As the great author Dr. Seuss wrote-

“And when you're alone there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.” 

“Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)”

-Drew