Tenant Dating Red Flags: What Makes You Think “Absolutely Not” Before the Lease Is Ev

General Landlording & Rental Properties
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Tenant Dating Red Flags: What Makes You Think “Absolutely Not” Before the Lease Is Ev

Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes

Finding a great tenant can feel a little like dating.

Everyone is on their best behavior in the beginning.

Then sometimes the red flags start appearing before you've even made it official…

🚩 Every previous landlord was “crazy.”
🚩 They want you to make an exception to just one little rule.
🚩 Then another exception.
🚩 They argue with your staff before they've even been approved.
🚩 Their story keeps changing.
🚩 Everything has to happen RIGHT NOW.
🚩 And somehow, nothing is ever their fault.

And you're sitting there thinking…

“I've dated this person before. I know how this ends.”

Obviously, rental decisions need to be based on your established screening criteria and applicable fair-housing laws, not a gut feeling.

But experienced landlords and property managers definitely learn to recognize behavioral red flags that tell them to slow down, document carefully and make sure they follow their process.

So let's hear them:

🚩 What's your biggest “tenant dating red flag”?

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Jim Johnson
Real Estate Agent · Memphis · Member since 2026 · 552 posts · 319 votes
19h

The story changing as you ask more questions. That’s the one that makes me slow everything down and start verifying the details twice. And when their urgency suddenly becomes your emergency on top of it, even more reason not to rush the process.

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  • Tony Christian
    Real Estate Consultant · Ft. Lauderdale, FL · Member since 2012 · 40 posts · 40 votes
    1d

    I would say being overly and unnaturally nice receives a cautious response. Anyone who treats me like a long lost friend, pulls me into conversations concerning personal issues, and other manipulative behavior are all red flags. They're usually the most emotionally driven, unstable, and volatile tenants.

    1Reply
  • Jules Aton
    MD/DC · Member since 2024 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    1d

    Prior foreclosure. If you didn’t pay your own mortgage I suspect it will be even easier not to pay mine.

    1Reply
    • Richard F.
      Honolulu, HI · Member since 2008 · 3k+ posts · 2k+ votes
      23h

      Depending on how long ago the foreclosure was, that factor alone is not sufficient to deny. What if they went through some major life event? Divorce, death of primary wage earner, major illness, or just could not keep up with repairs to an older home? You should be more concerned with the most recent 18 - 24 months of consumer accounts, and their overall proclivity for Bad Habits in other areas of their life. Mortgage obligations are much different from rental obligations. For that reason alone the typical credit score loses credibility since most that we see in screening tenants is based on a mortgage FICO model.

      0Reply
    • Jules Aton
      MD/DC · Member since 2024 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
      14h

      My rentals have always been in Class A neighborhoods with high demand so history of a foreclosure has been sufficient for me to decline. There have only been a few times when this scenario presented.

      0Reply
    • Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
      OP
      Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes
      14h

      Wow that sounds dreamy!

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  • Drew SygitBusiness Member
    Property Manager · Royal Oak, MI · Member since 2012 · 12k+ posts · 9k+ votes
    23h

    Depends on the tenant pool.

    We expect more from prospects looking to rent a Class A property vs a Class D.

    [email protected]248-209-6824
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    • Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
      OP
      Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes
      22h

      So true!! I am currently dealing with a lot of class C properties and the tenants issues that go along with that.

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  • Richard (Ryszard) Cieplechowicz
    Member since 2026 · 34 posts · 9 votes
    21h

    The one that makes me slow down is a changing answer on dates or prior rent. I wouldn't reject somebody over a hunch, but I'd verify the same facts against the same written criteria I use for everyone else and keep the notes.

    0Reply
    • Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
      OP
      Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes
      21h

      Good point! Changing information that you should be very familiar with is a red flag.

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  • Ming Yi
    Investor · San Francisco · Member since 2026 · 13 posts · 6 votes
    20h

    Mine is the applicant who has a long story about every previous landlord. Once is bad luck, three times is a pattern, and that pattern is moving into my property. I also pass on anyone who wants to negotiate the screening criteria before they have even applied. If they want to skip the credit check or pay the deposit "later," I am not interested. Another one: urgency that is not tied to anything real. "I need to move in this weekend" with no lease ending or job relocation usually means they are being evicted and hoping I will not check. One trick that helps: ask why they are moving, then listen to how much of the answer is someone else's fault. I self-manage five single-family homes, and the tenants who interview cleanly almost always pay cleanly.

    1Reply
    • Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
      OP
      Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes
      19h

      Yes, I have a question about this on my application because it is a red flag in my opinion. Another good point... If the tenant already wants to negotiate terms before they are approved is going to be a headache the entire lease. Accountability is important in all aspects of life and if a tenant cant take accountability the tenant/PM relationship will not go well.

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  • Jim Johnson
    Real Estate Agent · Memphis · Member since 2026 · 552 posts · 319 votes
    19h

    The story changing as you ask more questions. That’s the one that makes me slow everything down and start verifying the details twice. And when their urgency suddenly becomes your emergency on top of it, even more reason not to rush the process.

    1Reply
  • Aiden AvtgisBusiness Member
    Real Estate Agent · Cleveland, OH · Member since 2024 · 35 posts · 16 votes
    19h

    My biggest red flag is probably when I ask where the rent is and I hear, “The check is in the mail.” 😂 We all know that check is NOT in the mail.

    That phrase has caused so much landlord anxiety.

    0Reply
  • Diana KhanPro Member
    Attorney · 10451 Mill Run Cir #755 Owings Mills, MD 21117 · Member since 2024 · 375 posts · 144 votes
    6h
    Quote from @Shelley Clements:

    Finding a great tenant can feel a little like dating.

    Everyone is on their best behavior in the beginning.

    Then sometimes the red flags start appearing before you've even made it official…

    🚩 Every previous landlord was “crazy.”
    🚩 They want you to make an exception to just one little rule.
    🚩 Then another exception.
    🚩 They argue with your staff before they've even been approved.
    🚩 Their story keeps changing.
    🚩 Everything has to happen RIGHT NOW.
    🚩 And somehow, nothing is ever their fault.

    And you're sitting there thinking…

    “I've dated this person before. I know how this ends.”

    Obviously, rental decisions need to be based on your established screening criteria and applicable fair-housing laws, not a gut feeling.

    But experienced landlords and property managers definitely learn to recognize behavioral red flags that tell them to slow down, document carefully and make sure they follow their process.

    So let's hear them:

    🚩 What's your biggest “tenant dating red flag”?

    @Shelley Clements, for me, one of the biggest red flags is when a prospective tenant wants exceptions to the rules before they have even gone through the normal screening process. I would rather slow things down and stick to the same written criteria for everyone than make a decision based on a conversation or a gut feeling.

    I’ve had landlord clients come to me after a tenant situation became difficult, and sometimes the issue started much earlier with unclear screening practices or lease terms that were not handled consistently. I’ve found that having a clear process, keeping good records, and making sure the lease matches how the property will actually be managed can prevent a lot of problems later.

    I really like this topic, @Shelley Clements, because it connects closely with the landlord tenant work I do with property owners. Your point about slowing down and following a process is important. Happy to stay connected and keep following what you share.

    [email protected]240-266-0291
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    • Shelley ClementsBusiness Member
      OP
      Real Estate Consultant · Ardmore, OK · Member since 2020 · 43 posts · 14 votes
      14m

      I have became very skilled at recognizing the red flags. I have developed these skills in SOP for my company hoping to make this needed skill transferable.

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      Elevate PM Audit and Consultation
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