I'm feeling like a bad person.

General Landlording & Rental Properties
7yFollow

I'm feeling like a bad person.

Chris Hanisco
Rental Property Investor · New England · Member since 2010 · 86 posts · 75 votes

Hi all,

I'm new here. I'm technically not a landlord yet, but I made an offer on a duplex and it was accepted today. I'm having it inspected this Wednesday. I plan to live there with my two sons and rent out half. I'm feeling bad about something, and I'm hoping some of you can tell me that I'm doing the right thing.

There are month-to-month tenants on each side, and I plan to have the property be vacant at closing. 

Here's why I feel bad....
My 13-yo son is (sort of) friends with a tenant's son, and he (the tenant's son) thinks we are moving in next door and everything is going to be peachy. (My son knew my offer was accepted before I was even able to tell him the news, because this kid told him first at school.) I don't know the parents.

I would be okay with keeping them as tenants except for the following reasons:

1. They wouldn't let us in the see their side the other day even with almost a weeks notice. (I felt this showed that they were not respecting their landlord.)

2. The yard is a mess with broken down stuff and debris. It looks like they don't respect the property.

3. They have 2 large dogs. I like dogs, but I don't want them barking and pooping in the yard, and I worry about fleas and shedding and damage.

4. The amount that they pay in rent is about $400-600/mo less than it should be. (Especially once I remodel.)

5. The boy told my son that their current landlord is an a**hole  - one reason being that he starts a lawsuit if they are late with their rent. (This tells me they have been late with their rent and think it's no big deal.)

So, I know there are so MANY reasons to make them go, but the "mom" in me feels bad - especially since there are few if any rentals in our little school district. And maybe I'm wrong and they are wonderful people and overwhelmed with life. I know I am! 

I know I can't let this bother me. This is an investment and a "business". Plus, I need the rent higher to even make this work. My boys and I come first. How do I handle this delicately? I need a pep talk if anyone is willing. Thanks.

3Reply
99 views

Most Popular Reply

Tchaka Owen
Real Estate Agent · Merritt Island, FL · Member since 2017 · 986 posts · 1k+ votes
7y

@Chris Hanisco - think about the $400-600/mo you won't be able to spend on your son and yourself because you're being charitable to someone who has shown a pattern of not respecting the property you are purchasing. Great, now you don't feel bad anymore.

Here's a suggestion on how to approach it: the entire property needs updating so everyone has to leave. They are welcome to submit an application once the work is done, which will be in several months. The chance of them returning is slim. 

31Reply
See this reply in the discussion

65 Replies

Jump to latestLatest
  • Lori Greene
    Specialist · Huntsville, UT · Member since 2015 · 458 posts · 249 votes
    7y

    I agree with separating yourself from the eviction by blaming it on the seller contract, the realtor, the property mgmt co, lender, silent partner etc. Keep your focus on your property and your relationship with your son but leave the eviction to others who can help you stay out of it. Using the help of eviction experts is safer for you anyway. You never know how far some people will flip out when being evicted. In fact, you shouldn't move in until the eviction has happened and is behind you.

    5Reply
  • Bob B.
    Investor · Jasper GA · Member since 2015 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    7y

    Blame it on the bank but explain the money facts to your son.  He'll respect you for being upfront and not treating him as a little kid.  Use this as a teaching lesson.  Have him help with the cleanup and remodel.  He'll see the big picture. 

    3Reply
  • Jim K.
    Handyman · Pittsburgh, PA · Member since 2018 · 5k+ posts · 13k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco

    At the very least, this is going to be a quality lesson for your children about what happens to people who are unwilling to make difficult choices and decisions about the future. Just look at this situation:

    1. Did someone force these tenants to go get two big dogs? Is there a manual out for the tenant lifestyle out there that explains that having these animals makes you a far more desirable tenant?

    2. Is there a guy hiding behind the door with a stick that jumps out and beats them silly whenever they gear up to go out to clean their yard?

    3. Where's the financial guru that told them that paying the rent should be a second or third paycheck allocation priority?

    4. A week's notice to see their side? That's not quiet enjoyment, that's abuse of possession.

    5. Were they complaining about the cheap rent while they lived there? Was something stopping them from saving that money for when the wolf came to the door?

    Well, the wolf's at the door now for them. And all of it seems so unfair, and so hideously wrong, and why can't the world just be a kinder, gentler place (for them)?

    So now they have to move, and your son's friend may have to leave the school district, and it's just going to scar that poor, poor child for life...

    Now here's something you should consider: for all you know, you may be doing your son's friend the biggest favor of his life to date, graphically showing him the folly and error of his parents' ways, their inability to grasp the reality of their tenuous housing situation and work proactively to keep from being in a situation like this.

    5Reply
  • Patrick Fraire
    Flipper/Rehabber · Long Beach, CA · Member since 2017 · 155 posts · 118 votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco

    Wow this is a tough one. I have never heard of a situation like this. I understand why you’d feel bad. Those kids are probably excited. But I think you pointed out some red flags that can’t be ignored. I’d put on the business woman hat right away and give them notice. If they confront you just be honest and tell them you need to remodel and raise rents. Good luck!

    0Reply
  • Steve K.
    Realtor · Boulder, CO · Member since 2016 · 3k+ posts · 5k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco

     Just think of it like this: the situation with the soon-to-be previous tenants will blow over relatively quickly, while your investment is long term.  In a few months when your building is rehabbed and stabilized with quality tenants paying market rent, you'll look back at this as a minor blip. It will blend in with all the other minor blips you'll have dealt with by then.

    In the meantime, it may difficult to get your son to understand. I'd definitely get ahead of that, and explain how you're under contract, and that the contract stipulates the building be delivered empty. You need to rehab the building and raise rent in order to make enough money to pay the bank each month, and that's it. 

    One piece of advice separate from this tenant situation: don't overdo the renovation. Classic newbie mistake (maybe even the most common one, and I'm in this club so don't be like me) is spending too much on rehab. It's tempting to go overboard making the unit really nice. But keep in mind that you may be redoing much of that work again sooner than you think, like during your next turnover even. So don't go full remodel, just do the minimal amount you need to get your targeted rent, using durable, cost-effective materials. Looking back I wish I had done less unnecessary remodeling, and definitely less worrying about tenant drama. 

    You'll still be there leveraging your asset in the wisest way possible long after this drama is ancient history. You're making the right decision, even though it is the hard decision.  

    @Chris Hanisco

    5Reply
  • Theresa HarrisPro Member
    Member since 2019 · 15k+ posts · 11k+ votes
    7y

    If you haven't already, add that you want to inspect the rental unit again AFTER the tenants move out and before closing.

    2Reply
  • Elizabeth Colegrove
    Hanford, CA · Member since 2013 · 5k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    7y

    @Jay Hinrichs I totally agree with Jay. Blame it on the banks.

    1Reply
  • Wesley WhiteheadPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Depends on where my employer sends me · Member since 2018 · 171 posts · 142 votes
    7y

    @Chris T. Agree with you on that one

    0Reply
  • Doug Pintarch
    Rental Property Investor · Harrisburg, PA · Member since 2018 · 369 posts · 406 votes
    7y
    Originally posted by @Dennis M.:

    No easy way to accomplish this . You are going to have to be the alpha dog and lay the law down unfortunately  . Forget that the tenants son is a friend of your sons . That’s just details that will cloud your judgment . If your sons are important to you then do what’s best for their future and yours . That means full market rent with good quality tenants who pay on  time ! Don’t be a pushover , it will hurt you financially in this business . Wanting better for your family doesn’t make you a bad person . You must do the hard work that is required 

     This.    People will crap right on your face right after they kiss you and tell you how wonderful you are.  Get them out and don't blame it on anyone but yourself. Their kid will be told to hound your kid o find out who your "A-hole silent partner" is so they can bug him or sue them for some imagined slight.   Get them out and stand your ground with them, and your son.

    Sorry to be so blunt but there it is.    Humans man, they'll game the sytsem.

    3Reply
  • Charlie MacPherson
    China, ME · Member since 2014 · 3k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco Be ready to play hardball on closing day.

    Do a final walkthrough an hour before closing to be sure that the property is delivered vacant, and if your P&S specifies it, broom clean. Also look for any damages.

    Document with cell photos and take those to the closing table.

    If not, I would refuse to close until those situations are remedied.  If it's vacant but still a mess (and I'll bet that's the case), you can still close, but do a holdback of funds sufficient to remedy the situation.

    I don't know what evictions are like there, but here in MA it can take months.  If both units are not vacant, I wouldn't close until they are.

    7Reply
  • Matthew Paul
    Severna Park, MD · Member since 2013 · 7k+ posts · 7k+ votes
    7y

    Get written PROOF that they are out .  And the unit totally empty .  You may hear that they may still have a little stuff left . Well its just as easy to move things back in as it is to move things out .

    2Reply
  • Michael Noto
    Real Estate Agent · Southington, CT · Member since 2008 · 5k+ posts · 3k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco The current owner is the one making them vacate before it sells. Not you. I wouldn't sweat this, it is a part of the business especially when buying in smaller towns. Everybody knows everybody.

    3Reply
  • Patrick M.
    Rental Property Investor · Red Bank, NJ · Member since 2017 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco I respectfully disagree with those who recommend you lie or hide from the truth with the tenants removal. There is absolutely no reason to and Will only confound a very straightforward removal.

    This is part of the process and what makes you a great landlord. Do not lie thinking it will soften the blow- and do not put that on your conscience. The first thing they will ask is to move in after the closing!

    Embrace it- be honest and straightforward, you did nothing wrong, there is absolutely no reason to lie.

    6Reply
  • J Chad Davis
    Rental Property Investor · Galveston, TX · Member since 2018 · 49 posts · 29 votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco This is a good opportunity to teach your sons the difference in people who seem nice versus those who actually do what they say they will. The tenant is already a problem and you haven’t yet taken possession of the property! Your obligation is to your sons and yourself and this tenant’s behavior will cost your sons money; they are relying on you “feeling bad” to prevent you from forcing them to do what they should. Personally, I would anticipate having to evict them or giving notice to vacate at end of the lease, depending on timing and local laws. Allowing a problem to persist is not the lesson you want to teach your sons and that’s far more important than the temporary discomfort of addressing the problem head-on.

    0Reply
  • Thomas S.
    Member since 2016 · 13k+ posts · 12k+ votes
    7y

    This can be a tough business when it comes to making the right business decisions. Many have suggested you lie to your tenants and your kids. They lie regularly to make themselves feel better when making tough business decisions out of fear or guilt. They lack the necessary mind set to be truly successful without lies. Being a landlord and operating a business is not going to get easier if you can not be honest and own your decisions.

    There is absolutely no doubt you are making the right decision. Your problem, as you have state, is how you feel about that decision. If you can not eliminate feelings from business decisions you will have a rough road ahead in this business.  

    This decision you are grappling with is going to be insignificant compared to what you will need to do when the day comes that your single mother tenant can not make her rent payment. 

    2Reply
  • Bjorn AhlbladPro Member
    Investor · Shelton, WA · Member since 2017 · 6k+ posts · 6k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco You had me at reason # 1! 😀 LL's get regrets when they ignore red flags.

    1Reply
  • Julie N.
    Real Estate Investor · Unionville, CT · Member since 2016 · 260 posts · 167 votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco don’t feel bad. I get it though. You’re running a business, not babysitting. Think of it that way. It is what it is and you’ll have to keep emotion out of it. Good luck.

    1Reply
  • Cyndie Rogers
    Real Estate Broker · Crystal River, FL · Member since 2017 · 27 posts · 11 votes
    7y

    Don't be confused.  You already know what you need to do.   Would you let anyone take food out of your children's mouths, just to be nice?   I get it.  You are a nice person but you are also a business person and that takes precedence.

    2Reply
  • Joe Scaparra
    Investor · Austin, TX · Member since 2013 · 680 posts · 1k+ votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco , I don't get why people on this thread even think you owe the current tenants an explanation  You are as a condition of buying the property having the current OWNER evict the tenant.  Nothing to discuss with anyone.  If it was me I would move in on that side after I renovated for myself, especially if the other tenant is worth keeping.  I would rather have one paying tenant after I acquire the property.  Your business between you and the current owner is your business and not necessary to even discuss with others if you don't want to.  I had the exact same situation with a duplex I bought in 2005 and I never even had a discussion with the outgoing tenant.  Don't make this a bigger deal than it really is.  Cheers.

    4Reply
  • Rhonda Wilson
    Rental Property Investor · Tacoma, WA · Member since 2018 · 113 posts · 149 votes
    7y

    Hi Chris, I can relate to what you are going through. It is very easy to relate to tenants - especially families with children. None of us wants to be the evil landlord. However, from my experience, the description of the tenants you have given is exactly like those of the most problematic tenants with whom I have had experience. In general, tenants lie on a spectrum of respecting their landlord and the property or not. It seems quite clear that these tenants do not and never will respect either. 

    I like the suggestion of shifting the blame on circumstances and an indifferent 3rd party such as a bank. Another tact is to focus on specific habitability issues - "Habitability" is a good word to use because as a landlord you are required to provide a habitable dwelling - that require renovation that cannot be performed while the unit is occupied. We have asked tenants to leave a unit in which the bathroom floor needed to be torn out to the subfloor. With only one bathroom in the unit, it was impossible to gut the bathroom with tenants in place. 

    1Reply
  • Ron Fletcher
    Leclaire, IA · Member since 2016 · 161 posts · 130 votes
    7y

    @Chris Hanisco

    It’s good that you are a caring person but this is a business decision and has to decided based on what you are trying to accomplish with your investment. Proceed with your original plan.

    0Reply
  • Billy Linn
    Investor · Green River, WY · Member since 2017 · 122 posts · 59 votes
    7y

    Don't know if this would work with your son but I would explain the business decisions that you are having to make and how those will impact the family. Too many kids get told simple excuses so they don't have to deal with hard situations then they don't have the tools they need when they get older. I really wish my parents would have included me in financial (and other) decisions when I was younger because it took a really long time to learn them on my own. If you can include your son and have him come to the same decision that's a major win. Defanity a lot of learning opportunities here for him.

    Good luck and congrats!

    2Reply
  • Account Closed
    Rental Property Investor · Brooke Park Drive · Member since 2018 · 1k+ posts · 2k+ votes
    7y

    Rent out both sides of the duplex.  Rent a third place for u and son.

    1Reply
  • Thomas S.
    Member since 2016 · 13k+ posts · 12k+ votes
    7y

    "None of us wants to be the evil landlord"

    Evil landlord is only in the mind of the tenant and not something you have any control over. Business and money have no feelings which makes tenants feelings a none issue when making the right business decision. If your concern is how you will be perceived you are in the wrong business. 

    This is why social workers can not be successful business owners.

    1Reply
  • Mark Sewell
    Investor · Houston, TX · Member since 2017 · 1k+ posts · 871 votes
    7y
    Originally posted by @Jay Hinrichs:

    thats a tough one dont want to set up a bullying situation for your son.. I think it would depend on how tough he is and what the other kid is like.. 

    But you can blame it on the bank .. I know being a lender everyone is quick to blame us.. so use that card.. bank made me do it.  :)  Everyone understands big bad bank

    Wow, Jay I was about to say the exact same thing.  Blame it all on the bank.  Oh well.

    0Reply
Join the conversationCreate a free account to reply, vote on answers and follow this thread.
Log InJoin for Free