Real Estate Agent · Manchester, CT · Member since 2019 · 2 posts · 0 votes
My wife is not on board with buying a rehab unit to update and force Equity in the property. She wants turn key. In our market with what she is looking for we can not afford. We will have a liability not an asset. So I told her we need to buy a two family and use the extra income for the property she wants. Now it has been come hard to find it to Family because she still is looking for an updated unit. What advice or help can you guys give me to get her on the same page on investing in a property for the future. 
Eastern Mass & Central Maine · Member since 2009 · 252 posts · 135 votes
6y
Figure out how much house you can afford by getting pre-approved for a mortgage.
Start viewing houses - together. If you cannot find a house that your wife likes and you can afford, your wife may change her mind about buying a turnkey.
Alex is right. Go through the numbers with her and make her part of the process. When you look at a place that needs a bit of work, explain the time and cost required to get it to market value.
You may want to look at a few turnkey places that are within your budget for your first place to get her on board.
Real Estate Agent · Manchester, CT · Member since 2019 · 2 posts · 0 votes
6y
@Theresa Harris
We are pre approved, however the house she is looking at will put us in a hole. I told her that we have to get a Two family to get the type of house she is looking for. We can use that income to help pay for the house she wants. She is still looking for a turn key rental and I want to pull my hair out. I can’t win.
We are pre approved, however the house she is looking at will put us in a hole. I told her that we have to get a Two family to get the type of house she is looking for. We can use that income to help pay for the house she wants. She is still looking for a turn key rental and I want to pull my hair out. I can’t win.
Turn it around and ask her how you will come out ahead with the turnkey house she chose. Get her to do the math may make her see it differently than you telling her the numbers don't work.
Developer · Santa Clarita, CA · Member since 2008 · 15k+ posts · 10k+ votes
6y
Look up stats on Real Estate investments and show them to her. More millionaires have been created through real estate than any other investment vehicle in the world. Its that simple. If she does not understand the numbers, perhaps a non bias third party could be of use in this situation. House hacking and BRRRR are great strategies to build wealth and getting the house of your dreams is more of an emotional buy than a wise investment decision.
That all said, a happy wife is a happy life so obviously you need to tread lightly here. Numbers don't lie so if you or another (like your banker) can show here what you can get with your version and where you will be going down that road with your version compared to hers, that may turn the corner for her and you.
Rental Property Investor · Hawthorne, CA · Member since 2018 · 655 posts · 900 votes
6y
@Korey Ranson
First you need to figure out how important your marriage is. Then you need to figure out how much strain your marriage can withstand.
If you value your marriage and you know that your marriage cannot survive the stress of real estate investing and rehabbing a place and having to go through all the potential pitfalls, then I would save your marriage because money isn’t as important as family.
Now if you don’t give a **** about that, then do your investing because you can find another wife that supports you and real estate investing 100%.
Life is full of choices you make your choices and live with the consequences. That’s what mature people do.
Investor · Orlando, FL · Member since 2016 · 355 posts · 380 votes
6y
This is a good discussion to have and it's one most of us have probably been through. Spouses seem to have trouble getting into the investor frame of mind with real estate--that you're buying property for the sole purpose of producing income...not making an emotional connection with a place you're going to live in. My wife was extremely wary and discouraging when I got into this game, but she came around when she could clearly see that we're on a path to financial freedom.
Rental Property Investor · Chubbuck, ID · Member since 2018 · 532 posts · 466 votes
6y
My wife has a hard time seeing the potential. She just sees a dump. We have built a few houses As well and she can’t picture the house until Sheetrock is in. Your wife has to look past the ugly carpet and cabinets and see the end result or has to trust that you can see that. Ask her to trust you and show her what you can do to make a dump into a really nice place where people will want to live.
Rental Property Investor · Erie, PA · Member since 2018 · 6k+ posts · 9k+ votes
6y
If she’s apprehensive now wait till she sees you dealing with trying to keep your head above water and the daily struggles of tenants toilets and trash ! Point is it’s not going to get easier after you buy the property that’s for sure . You’ll need grit and iron will to succeed . Don’t force her into it . Look Your the leader of the house your the man so lead . Show her you have done the research and your willing to do what it takes to achieve the goal and just start .
Real Estate Agent · Southington, CT · Member since 2008 · 5k+ posts · 3k+ votes
6y
@Korey Ranson This is a challenging situation for sure and I have clients who have experienced similar things with spouses. In the end if they are not on board then it will be a constant struggle because like @Dennis M. mentioned the day to day of owning/managing rental real estate is what most spouses look at as the inconvenience.
In your case it sounds as though the type of property is what you aren't seeing eye to eye on. How much more would you have to save to purchase what she wants or even something closer to the middle in terms of condition? That may be an option.
Rental Property Investor · Grand Prairie, TX · Member since 2018 · 2k+ posts · 2k+ votes
6y
@Korey Ranson
My wife was on board with our first investment property we bought 5 years ago. It was a turnkey and looked amazing from day one. She was proud of this one. However, it wasn't cash flowing that well. At least I had her on board. Then I bought another nice turn key in a good area that cash flowed a few hundred a month. Not great, not bad. Then I did the math and figured out older beat up SFRs were the way to go. She definitely wasn't on board with me buying the next six ugly houses in C class hoods. This caused problems in my marriage for a couple years..especially when things would break. They cash flowed much better and are appreciating so much more due to being starter type homes. I rehabbed a couple really ugly ones in the last year that have done well for me. One I paid only 48k for and now rents for 1400/month. The other one I paid 135k cash for and did a BRRRR on it which got appraised for 215k and rents for $1,675/mo. I was able to get 150k out of that BRRRR and bought another old beater (with the free money) for 132k. I'll probably do another BRRRR on this new property when the wife is on board.
The key for me with getting my wife somewhat on board with buying rentals is to not spend time on the properties. I hire everything out and rarely ever go over to them. My wife’s happiness with me around her and the family is more important to my marriage than trying to save a buck by running over to the props and doing things myself. I’m up to 8 rentals by doing this hands off approach and she seems cool with it finally. The positive cash flow with these 8 properties is over 3k and she is finally seeing the value of real estate investing. But the first couple years wasn’t fun trying to convince her how I planned on doing this.
Rental Property Investor · Concord, NC · Member since 2016 · 1k+ posts · 3k+ votes
6y
Maybe have her read "Turnkey Dad, Cat Urine Dad"
Turnkey Dad makes no money off the purchase, pays a premium for turn key, makes an 8% RIO, and develops few additional skills and experience.
Cat Urine Dad buys a stinker, builds 40% equity by doing repairs, makes 15% ROI, develops contractor relationship and rehab skills that carry over to future projects. Not to mention the great feeling accomplishment.
BTW, my favorite smell is that of pet urine in a property for sale
My wife is not on board with buying a rehab unit to update and force Equity in the property. She wants turn key. In our market with what she is looking for we can not afford. We will have a liability not an asset. So I told her we need to buy a two family and use the extra income for the property she wants. Now it has been come hard to find it to Family because she still is looking for an updated unit. What advice or help can you guys give me to get her on the same page on investing in a property for the future. 
Rental Property Investor · Oakland County · Member since 2018 · 151 posts · 97 votes
6y
@Korey Ranson As others have already stated, go through the analysis process with your wife. If she's not interested in that, then give her the important numbers in some form that she can look at. Maybe being able to see where the challenges are with turn-key will allow her to start thinking about other solutions. You can also ask her why she thinks turn key is best and have her defend her decision. Or if she agrees that the numbers don't work, ask her what she thinks a good solution would be. She may come up with something brilliant!
On the other hand, have you considered checking alternate markets? If you could find a turn-key deal elsewhere, would that be worth investing in to you?