Tenant Applicants say the dumbest things

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Tenant Applicants say the dumbest things

Robin Grimes
Real Estate Investor · Houston, TX · Member since 2010 · 37 posts · 326 votes

Stupid things Tenant Applicant’s say.

I had renovated a nice 4/3/2 and put it on the market for lease. Here are some of the comments from people who toured the property during the open house or called me from signage.

#1
Young single mother with 3yr old in tow. “My boyfriend will be paying the rent, he said to just go find a place, but I want to rent it in my name, so it will be mine alone.”
I’m thinking: I’m not renting to someone without the verified income to pay the rent. Sorry but a promise from a boyfriend just won’t do.
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25 but you should know that I will need to verify income and whoever is paying will need to be on the application and lease.

#2
Middle aged couple with no kids. Wife says “I don’t like the wood floors. If you can put down carpet and repaint to something brighter, we’d be interested. Also you will need to replace the stove.”
I’m thinking: The wood floors are new laminate that I just spent $1400 and two days installing. The paint is all new also. If you want to remodel a house, go buy one yourself.
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25. The property is being rented in its newly remodeled condition.

#3
Family. Made appointment and met me at house. Husband says “I need a 3 car garage.”
I’m thinking: The 2 in 4/3/2 stands for TWO car garage. Plus the photos show it’s a two car garage, so why are you here wasting my time and yours? Did you think I was hiding a third garage bay in the back yard?
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25. This house only has a two car garage.

#4
Very young guy, young 20’s maybe, called me from sign in yard. He’s parked at house. Says: “ I need a big place for my girlfriend and our 3 month old since we want to have more kids. Could you help me out and rent it to me for $xxx” (about ½ the rental rate).
I’m thinking: So you’re requesting that I contribute half your rent so you can have more kids that you can’t house and support.
I’m saying: I’m happy to provide an application. The application fee is $25. Sorry the rental rate is firm.
.

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Don KonipolBusiness Member
Investor · The Woodlands TX / Avon, CT · Member since 2009 · 6k+ posts · 10k+ votes
14y

Last year I was renting a high end high rise condo - rent $1800 per month. A guy asked if I could give him the first 6 months free and waive the security deposit, after he found a job he would make double payments the second 6 months.

Had a tenant a few years back that signed a 12 month lease. always paid her rent on time. The lease of course becomes a month to month if she stays on. I asked her if she desired to renew the lease at expiration, or would she be moving. She said that since she fullfilled her lease obligation by paying 12 months rent she would stay on. She honestly believed that once she paid 12 months rent the apartment was hers for free for as long as she wanted!

But the best one was the tenant that always had an excuse for late rent. One month he told me he had sent the check in on the 2nd, of course I had not received it by the 5th. When I did receive it it was dated the 6th. Called the tenant and told him if he was going to lie at least pre date the check.
The next month I send the tenant an invoice for the rent, late fee, plus $250. The tenant calls and asks what the additional $250 is for. I told him it was a "lying fee". A couple days later I received the rent, late fee, and an additional $500. Called the tenant to ask why he sent an additional $500. He said he knew he would lie to me again in the future so he was prepaying an additional lying fee! BTW, although he is no longer a tenant and hasn't been for some time, he is now a friend. The entertainment value of this guy far outweighted the aggravation.

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  • Jon K.
    Member since 2011 · 798 posts · 216 votes
    13y

    Ha, wow, fun thread.

    I had one person e-mail saying "I need a place ASAP." Something felt wrong about their inquiry, so I googled and looked at their court records. They were just being evicted that week. Yeah, NO.

    Another asked about deposits. Read. the. lease. Deposits are returned after lease completion and after move out.

    Had another say they had a kid who only lived here part-time. H#LL no. (This is a roommate situation, I can reject anyone.)

    I had another tenant/roommate say they had a pet who sometimes stayed with someone else, and sometimes with them. What part of "NO PETS" do they not understand?

    I had a few say "I only smoke outside" or "I only smoke rarely." Um, no. No, you don't. You smoke all the time, and you'll smoke inside my house when it's cold... no matter what you say. NEXT...

    I've had others who asked to pro-rate rent for move in. They couldn't pay the small rent up-front. Yeah, no.

    I had one who had no job and no school. Said her parents paid.
    No job = no renting from me. (Roommate situation.. I can reject.)

    I had another who had no job, no car (no transit nearby), and said they were in school. I google the school, and they're not enrolled until the next semester. No job/car/school/rental references = no.

    I got a variety of "I work from home." As in, you UN-work from home? If they worked from home and made actual money, they wouldn't be renting a cheap room in my house. NEXT...

    What else...

    I get inquiries of people with criminal records.

    I get inquiries from people with recent collections.

    I get tons of people say "do you accept couples" for a bills paid room. Um, no,... 2 people = more utilities. Get it?

    Then, I get the e-mails that don't make sense or can't form a complete sentence. Or ones like "can i get address". No, no, you can't. I don't give out the address until you tell me about yourself.

    I get inquiries months away. Yeah, what roommate situation holds a bedroom for rent open for several months? I like the early planning, but... seriously.

    I can pay 3 months in advance. (In other words, your credit is horrible and/or you've been evicted and/or you're unemployed?)

    I get a few who ask to negotiate rent. Um, no, this isn't Uzbekistan. My rent is cheap. Stop trying to rip me off.

    My inquiries are boring compared to the others listed here.

    13Reply
  • John A.
    Investor · Sierra Vista, AZ · Member since 2013 · 168 posts · 126 votes
    13y

    From a recently divorced young mother, "I know my credit is bad. But, I'm going to start a home daycare business."

    Not in my house.

    36Reply
  • Rob K.
    Investor · Southeast, MI · Member since 2012 · 2k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    I like when someone says, "I make really good money."

    I always try and guess how much "really good money" will be before they say it. It's usually some pittance like $12 per hour.

    19Reply
  • Carl Schmitt
    CT · Member since 2010 · 135 posts · 100 votes
    13y

    This thread is hilarious...The more people you meet, the more you realize that normal people are the minority.

    26Reply
  • Robin Grimes
    OP
    Real Estate Investor · Houston, TX · Member since 2010 · 37 posts · 326 votes
    13y

    While prospective tenant was filling out application she made a point of telling me twice that she had "Never paid a late fee". Which was supposed to mean she always paid on time. My warning flag went up and was confirmed when I spoke with her previous and only landlord. Prior landlord: "She always paid a few days late and never with the late fee. I didn't renew the contract and I'll be taking them out of her deposit".

    9Reply
  • Rob K.
    Investor · Southeast, MI · Member since 2012 · 2k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    I had one recently that was similar to the question about being within 1,000 feet of a school.

    A woman called and asked if the schools were close. Usually people with young kids will ask something like this. She sounded older, but she coulld have been younger and had the voice of a heavy smoker. Or, she could've had custody of a grandkid.

    I told her that there was an elemetrary school not far away. She then went on to say that her son was in prison, but needed to register as a sex offender when he got out and would be living with her. I responded with, "Brett Favre." She said, "Brett Favre?". I said, "Yes. That means I pass." She got angry and hung up.

    A few days later, I was pretty sure she called again. Her voice was so husky, it could pull a sled. She again asked if there were schools close by. I said, "There's an elementary school not far away." She said, "I don't want to be near schools. I don't like schools."

    She must have gotten the same denial from other landlords and changed the way she asked.

    34Reply
  • George P.
    Property Manager · Livonia, MI · Member since 2011 · 4k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    haha, this thread is gold....

    here's what i can remember now, but more will come to me later..

    - "i love this house. i love it, love it. i am fixing my credit". on the way out she said "Ok y'all, we are going to the casino now. hope to see you later".

    - stated 3 times before they came out that the house has NO basement. comes in and says "It's small, does it have a basement"?

    - can you finish the basement? (cost of about 10k).

    - What kind of background check do you do? I just started a young boys program after school... (started sweating and wiping his forehead).

    - will you install a storm door? i absolutely need a storm door. Will you install blinds? i absolutely need blinds.

    - rent is $1,100? my budget is $850. can you come down a little bit?

    8Reply
  • Steven Hamilton IIPro Member
    Accountant, Enrolled Agent · Grayslake, IL · Member since 2011 · 5k+ posts · 2k+ votes
    13y

    God this thread is priceless. Rob K, I was laughing so hard it hurt to the husky and brett favre comments.

    [email protected]224-381-2660
    8Reply
  • Theresa K.
    Real Estate Broker · San Diego, CA · Member since 2012 · 104 posts · 20 votes
    13y

    Applicant comes to look at the property. Says she's on Section 8 and has been since like 1998. She says "I pay all of my rent. Well, most of it. They only pay a little. I just keep the Section 8 in case I need it. Like a backup, in case I lose my job or something." Must be nice. Gotta wonder how much money she make under the table.

    Then I say No Pets. She says "oh, I forgot, I have a dog."
    How do you FORGET you have a dog??

    7Reply
  • Amy A.
    Portland, ME · Member since 2012 · 616 posts · 550 votes
    13y

    Me:
    "I do a credit and criminal background check, what will I find?"
    Him:
    "Oh, just a few assults, but it was a long time ago, I was young."
    Me: "How long ago?"
    Him: "About 6 months!"

    30Reply
  • Dawn AnastasiPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Milwaukee, WI · Member since 2013 · 6k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    13y

    I was taking applications today for a new rental unit, and this mother and her 2 daughters come. First of all, the mother had been thinking I would give her a "reminder call" today to show up. (Not sure where she got that idea because I never said anything about doing that.)

    Then, they came and looked around. The two things the eldest daughter asked:

    Her: Are you going to replace out this light fixture in the bathroom, it's ugly!
    Me: No, it works just fine.
    Her: Oh, come on, a new light is just a couple bucks.
    Me: A new light fixture, even a basic one, is at least $25-$30.
    Her: Yeah, like I said, a couple bucks.

    Her: Can you take this desk out of here? (Built-in desk in bedroom)
    Me: No, it's built in.
    Her: I have a queen sized bed and I don't think I could get it in here with that desk in the way.
    Me: The room really wouldn't support a queen sized bed.

    Luckily they left without putting in an application. I can imagine if they lived there, the light fixture in the bathroom would "accidentally" get broken so they'd have to get a new one.

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    6Reply
  • Zac P.
    Rental Property Investor · Lexington, KY · Member since 2012 · 115 posts · 64 votes
    13y

    Had a tenant come in saying she was self employed (lied) and wanted to leave the trailer park because of the drugs around her son (lied). She said she was going to come in later to show proof of income and apply. Later that day I went to eviction court and saw one of my college buddies there. We started talking and turns out a he has a rental and the lady he was evicting was standing down the hall from us. I looked at her and it was the same woman that wanted to rent form me 2 hours prior. She looked at us and smiled. My buddy (first eviction) was like, "Wow, this is awkward". I told him, "You have no idea"! She came up to me and asked me if this is an automatic disqualifier... I told her I needed to talk to her landlord (my buddy) first, but that it's never good to see a future tenant in eviction court! Pass!

    18Reply
  • George P.
    Property Manager · Livonia, MI · Member since 2011 · 4k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    zac, i was going to ask "how do you know she lied", but then i see your reasoning... lol

    Dawn, i can see their point about the desk if the room could hold a bigger bed.

    2Reply
  • Dawn AnastasiPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Milwaukee, WI · Member since 2013 · 6k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    13y

    The desk was built-in. Meaning, built into the room. Meaning, I'd have to take a sawzall to cut it out. It was supporting a built-in bookshelf above. So you take out the desk, you'd have to take out the bookshelf. Would the applicant want me to start knocking down walls to suit their decorating preferences too?

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    13Reply
  • Pat L.
    Rental Property Investor · Upstate, NY · Member since 2012 · 3k+ posts · 3k+ votes
    13y

    We had a woman who we held the mortgage note on one of our properties.
    They sold it in a divorce.
    She then rented a home from us & @ yr end wanted
    Her 1098 for rent & property taxes paid. "Like I got from you before for my tax return"

    6Reply
  • Bill Gulley
    Investor, Entrepreneur, Educator · Springfield, MO · Member since 2009 · 21k+ posts · 12k+ votes
    13y

    mentioned before

    0Reply
  • George Paiva
    Investor · Milford, CT · Member since 2012 · 592 posts · 285 votes
    13y

    In the process of renting a 1br that is below market because in a mixed commercial building. The tenant pool has been amazing to say the least.

    I make out a sheet for all who call where I can use it for following up when I meet them or if they fill out an app: Here is some good comments I highlighted:

    This is a no smoking, no pet building. Typical response is "I will smoke outside." I write down on the sheet "smoker" don't they realize it follows them back into the apartment.

    I also get the response after I say "Credit and Background with Income Verification", "I make good money" My response is great we expect 3x income for this $600 a month apartment and a $600 security deposit. After a long pause, the response is oh you look for that much income. LOL..

    Another one that has been calling me almost every day for 2 weeks straight. After doing background I find his father is being foreclosed on and his mother was recently foreclosed. They must of been split up and both lost their places. Lets just say the son did not fall to far from the tree. Also his employment was temporary as well.

    Elderly woman from Florida moving back to home town. After credit check shows she's been through 2 foreclosures, all sorts of chargeoffs and collections. 2 past rentals with collections and her SSI was not 3x the rent. I stayed far away from this one. Although you would of never known talking and meeting with her.

    Countless Parents calling to find places for their kids. They basically want them out of the house but they work like after school jobs and haven't grown up yet. BTW these are late 20-early 30 year olds.

    Landlords also calling to "shuffle" their dead weight on me. Sorry no f'ing way.

    About 50% of them trying to downsize or look for cheaper rent but then expect granite counters and stainless appliances.

    One was boyfriend looking for a place for her live-in girlfriend. So I just threw it out. So you breaking up with your girl so you are finding a place for her? Yeah I have another girl on the side and what this one out. Of course this one has no job.

    2 Brothers come see the 1br. The older one says the place is for him but his younger brother may stay a night or two... Then later I find out the younger one is wanting to move in to go to another high school. His arrest record didn't look so good. Sorry I don't rent to drug dealers LOL.

    Many asking for negotiating on the rent right over the phone on initial call. Note this is a below market rent because its in a commercial building. I just hangup now.

    Bunch of baby moma's running away from boyfriend. Under the table job and living on assistance. These also fall into the "Oh I make good money" yeah right.

    Here's a good one. No Pet, No Smoke policy so the guy follows up with oh I want to get my own place so I can have a puppy. Well what part of no pet policy don't you understand.

    Another was an ex-stripper from the other side of the state who got into some lovers quarrel with a few state troopers and some other johns. My sense is she was turning tricks and the troopers found out and they got caught stalking this woman on the job. Not a good story. This was about a year earlier. Well bring it to today and shes a used car saleswoman that probably gives extra bonus if you buy the car on the spot. What do people think in the age of google that we can't easily look up this stuff.

    Been through 5 evictions in almost 3 years. First 3 was right when I took over property for my parents. I don't hesitate giving a notice to quit. They all ignore it till the marshall is serving summary process to show up in court. LOL... they all think i was bluffing. I don't take any BS anymore from a tenant. When they don't pay I consider it as if they are stealing from my plate. I don't tolerate any of it. I've heard and seen way too much to be complacent.

    I tell my mom all the time that we should write a book with all that we have encountered in the last 5 years.

    25Reply
  • Dawn AnastasiPro Member
    Rental Property Investor · Milwaukee, WI · Member since 2013 · 6k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    13y

    You should! At least an e-book.

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    0Reply
  • Jon Klaus
    Developer · Garland, TX · Member since 2008 · 8k+ posts · 4k+ votes
    13y

    Text: I have 5 pits. Is that OK?

    8Reply
  • Carlos Flores
    Commercial Real Estate Lender / Syndicator · Dallas, TX · Member since 2011 · 888 posts · 309 votes
    13y

    One slightly obnoxious guy said he was in the business [meaning real estate]; therefore, he didn't need to provide documentation or fill out an app.

    Lady asked if I'd be willing to reduce the rent if they signed a two year lease. What were you thinking, I ask. She wants $400/mo off. So you want me to loose $4800 over the next two years? Without a missing a beat, she says yes. Then breaking the silence she says, what if we signed a 5 year lease?

    When asked about income, another one said he and his wife were staying with some people in a wealthy area of town while they found a house. I'm thinking yeah, so what. How much do you make? Claimed he owned a restaurant, made $250k. Self-employed, huh? I'll need two years tax returns. Claims he doesn't file taxes in the US since he is from Mexico. Your restaurant is in the US, what about business tax returns? Poof, never heard from again.

    9Reply
  • Aly W.
    Investor · Middletown, NJ · Member since 2008 · 2k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    These are great! I'll throw another one out there. Applicant asks if we can hold the condo for 2 more months (this was beginning of January) until he gets his tax refund for the security deposit. I said, seriously? And how will you be paying the rent? "Unemployment", he says. Sure thing, let's sign you up right now!

    8Reply
  • Steve Babiak
    Real Estate Investor · Audubon, PA · Member since 2009 · 13k+ posts · 8k+ votes
    13y

    Oh, I forgot about the restaurant owners.

    Asian restaurant owners, looking at my rental. They own their own place, so why do they want the rental? Because they want to house their entire restaurant staff ...

    28Reply
  • George P.
    Property Manager · Livonia, MI · Member since 2011 · 4k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    oh, steve.... this is just too much.

    lol

    3Reply
  • Steve Babiak
    Real Estate Investor · Audubon, PA · Member since 2009 · 13k+ posts · 8k+ votes
    13y

    George P. - we all know how those TV reality shows stage things for drama, laughs, whatever. Only in our role as landlords do we see TRUE realities that are out there ... you just can't make this stuff up!

    3Reply
  • Mike McKinzie
    Investor · Westminster, CO · Member since 2009 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
    13y

    Great stories, one and all. My worse story was the guy who charged towards me when I told him I needed $20.00 for a credit check. He yelled, "I don't pay any of my bills except my rent, my credit rating is none of your business!? I almost had to swing my briefcase at his head (I am wearing a coat and tie)! His wife stopped him from finishing his charge at me.

    7Reply
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