Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
So recently I've been incredibly excited about this new journey of REI. I've been looking at properties in the Indianapolis/Louisville markets and have found some places I'm interested in. No one in my family has any experience in REI and quite frankly have been very discouraging in their remarks about my goals. I'd love to start in a duplex/triplex/fourplex using house hacking, however when I tell family that I get looks like I'm crazy. Any hints/facts I can give family that would help them see the upside that is REI? Thanks!
Huntsville, AL · Member since 2018 · 577 posts · 864 votes
6y
My wife thought I was insane when my business partner and I got a contract accepted on our first investment property. She pointed out everything that could go wrong, noted how I "didn't have time for this", and was afraid of how much money we would lose on the endeavor.
So what did I do? I completely ignored her and proceeded. And with time, she has even admitted it was a wise decision.
Rental Property Investor · South shore, MA · Member since 2017 · 1k+ posts · 1k+ votes
6y
Those "looks" you get is part skepticism from both you and your family. If you were 100% confident then it wouldn't matter what they think. The important thing to remember is you don't let it hold you back from pursuing what you want to do.
When I bought my first house in 2017 I received a lot of negative opinions, and a lot of wrong advice from my family. It affected me mentally but it didn't stop me from buying that house. I have over 100k in equity from that first purchase. I was told "why would you buy this, its a dump", and "wait till the market goes back down to buy a house", then I was told "buy a mobile home, its cheap living".
What they didn't know was the amount of hard work I was going to put in. They weren't watching my every move of what I was doing to make a good decision for myself. But that decision turned one house into three rental properties over the course of two years.
People dont know, what they don't know. Its just a little tougher when its family. And not for nothing, id rather fail then say I never tried.
depending on the situation, of course, I would wake up early when no one else is awake and just get to work. Eventually the fruits of your labor will show because most people believe after they see. We believe and then see.
Rental Property Investor · Cincinnati, OH · Member since 2019 · 18 posts · 10 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne I'm a newbie as well but have had similar push back on the "risk." I really don't talk about my ideas and goals with family unless I have concrete experience and evidence. Just has worked in my home life. Instead I slowly planted seeds that allowed me to bring up REI without it sounding so scary. Two things that have helped a lot are RDPD YouTube video talking about liability vs assets. Robert talks about how family members can be considered liabilities and you have a duty to everyone around you to pursue wealth in case of medical emergencies/ aging. I used that argument with a lot of techniques from "never split the difference" by Chriss Voss to convince (now she thinks it's her idea) my girl to purse house hacking with me. Now she's saying "if/when we buy a duplex." Now I'm working to get her comfortable with a quadplex 😊. When I type all this out, it sounds manipulative and like I'm a fear monger but really, at least from NSTD book, I've had less emotional fights and far more discussion just by being aware of what and how I present information. Still working at it all.
Rental Property Investor · San Jose, CA · Member since 2018 · 152 posts · 159 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne There’s the Parents, Siblings, in-law Family.
Then there’s your spouse. Two very different conversations, the first in which I wouldn’t value any negative opinions, and the latter I would tread cautiously with patience, love and respect. Even if it takes more time.
Don’t listen to any advice about “doing it anyway” or going over their head. This is a person you love, and you can only hope they would do the same for you if you were uncomfortable about something.
Flipper/Rehabber · Jackson Heights, NY · Member since 2019 · 28 posts · 16 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne
Hi Jeff,
First of all Thank you for your Service!
Second, I think that if you get in to a house hack situation with A VA loan you can potentially be in to a great deal for little money out of pocket. Just make sure that you anylize your Deal and dont go in Blind. I acually think that realestate is by far the smartest investment one should make! Thats just my .02 cents. Hope that it helps.
Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
6y
There are too many people to really reach out to and thank in this forum. This just reassures that I am heading down the correct path. I truly appreciate all of your opinions and thoughts. Just for reference no one in my family is what I would refer to as "financially independent". I have a goal of working for myself and being able to retire comfortably and not have to work a job unless I absolutely want to. I believe that by doing this myself I can show my family the positives. Again, thank you all. I knew this would be the place to get the support and information that I was seeking.
Rental Property Investor · Freehold, NJ · Member since 2019 · 9 posts · 3 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne
Hey Jeff, loved Reading this because I am in the same exact position as you are. In my position my family does not at all understand what I’m doing nor support it, and it can be discouraging to say the least. What I am doing is just going forward with my Education and responding to them when they have questions. I am hoping that when I start networking and attending conferences I will meet more like-minded people (like yourself).
The other day my family member sat me down at the table and criticized my plan every step of the way, I also plan on house hacking for my first property either a duplex triplex or four Plex. He sees negative on every deal and after 10 years he himself has never been able to pull the trigger on an investment property.
Please feel free to contact me at anytime to discuss your plans, my plans or just to shoot the poop. Just keep moving forward With your plans and hopefully prove everybody wrong. It’s not about them it’s about you and your life and your family.
Contractor · Warren, OH · Member since 2015 · 147 posts · 55 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne
I’ve been saving and doing research for a couple years now and I am almost ready to make my first purchase. I get the same reactions, but since I’ve been listening to as many podcasts as possible, reading as many real estate books as I can, talking to lenders, talking to people on BP, I’m able to explain how I have time for this or what happens if a tenant leaves or if the water heater breaks. Sometimes even though you have a plan for the problems that may arise some people just can’t get behind it or see it the way most people on this site do. I think you just have to prepare enough ahead of time and then execute your plan to show them that it does work.
Rental Property Investor · Gilbert, AZ · Member since 2016 · 3k+ posts · 4k+ votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne and @Jason Holt I agree with the concept that @Account Closed is stating. If the family members that are negative about real estate investing are not in the financial position that you would like to be in someday, then why would it matter to you what they say about investing? The obvious statement that comes to mind is, “don’t take financial advice from broke people.”
My parents are supportive and pleased by my success in real estate. However, all of my other family members, and most of the friends that I grew up with, don’t know what to say or how to respond to me when they find out that I own around 85 properties/units. So I have become a lot more discrete and a lot less vocal about my real estate investing when talking to family and friends. In fact, only one friend that I grew up with and none of my family members have been interested in learning how to invest like I invest.
I use BP as an outlet to talk about real estate investing.
Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
6y
@Robert Arquilla I am in the Army National Guard. But I totally agree with you. My issue is that I do have student debt, however I see this as an investment that will help me get out of debt sooner rather than later. My family sees me buying $10-$20 books on real estate as a waste of time, however if I spent that same money on clothes, eating out, etc it would be okay. As it stands I am working and paying down my debt while saving, I know, not the status quo of how to pay off debt, however I believe that once I can make my first buy I'll be much better off down the road.
Rental Property Investor · Saint John, IN · Member since 2015 · 17 posts · 3 votes
6y
With every new property, family and friends will do one of two things. They'll either support you or fight you. I've seen this time and time again, but the funny part is many of your friends and family will come back around and say "I have some money" after you show them that you didn't fail miserably. It really comes down to fear of the unknown.
Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
6y
@Shiloh Lundahl I see where you are coming from. I have learned to be very discrete when discussing financials with family as it is. I love my family, however I believe that at a young age I have a goal to head down a path created by myself. Most families do not see that, they see it as a risk, which it is. And while yes it is a risk, I'd much rather bet on myself to find a great deal/buy that will pay off than put money into a stock market where no one has a clue what will happen.
Specialist · Helena, AL · Member since 2017 · 40 posts · 100 votes
6y
Don't worry about what they say. As long as you do your research and want to do it then go for it. No one in my family has ever owned rental properties or been a part of real estate investing period. You can do it. Once you have a few assets they will change their opinion. Good luck!
Fort Collins, CO · Member since 2019 · 158 posts · 117 votes
6y
Run a deal through the BP calculator, print out the pdf analysis and show them how you will have 15-20% Cash on Cash in addition to the home going up at least 3%/year (100 year nationwide average) while being able to take depreciation against your taxes. Ask them what investments they have that are competitive. Also make note of the possibility of an economic downturn where ones investment portfolio can really take a hit, but ones real estate investment portfolio not so much.
Contractor · Warren, OH · Member since 2015 · 147 posts · 55 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne
Doesn’t the national guard pay off student loans?
Also I’m sure you looked into it and may even be getting one but normally they give a nice signing bonus. I was active duty in the marines and our bonus wasn’t as great as some of the reserve units but every bit helps. Army was giving out like 20k at one point and I think even higher depending on the occupation. That could definitely get you started.
Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
6y
@Robert Arquilla They are paying off student loans, however they only pay off publicly held loans backed by the government. I have those as well as private loans which is why RE is something that is very appealing to me. @Larry Alexander I need to run a report to show them. You can't argue with numbers!
Residential Real Estate Broker · East Brunswick, NJ · Member since 2016 · 24 posts · 5 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne - You are educating yourself to know the pitfalls and the risks. You are going into this with a barrier of entry that would be least risky. Unfortunately when it comes to things, or ideas others know little or nothing about they are skeptical. Surround yourself with people who have succeeded on this path. Go to meet ups with other REI's. Your family I'm sure just don't understand because they don't know what they don't know. If it is a spouse or significant other than take them on this journey with you. Good luck amd kick ***.
So recently I've been incredibly excited about this new journey of REI. I've been looking at properties in the Indianapolis/Louisville markets and have found some places I'm interested in. No one in my family has any experience in REI and quite frankly have been very discouraging in their remarks about my goals. I'd love to start in a duplex/triplex/fourplex using house hacking, however when I tell family that I get looks like I'm crazy. Any hints/facts I can give family that would help them see the upside that is REI? Thanks!
Why does Family's opinion matter? Do what you need to do and let them be jealous of your success.
Rental Property Investor · Farmington, UT · Member since 2018 · 171 posts · 148 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne I know it’s tough, but the sooner you can stop caring what others say or think.... the happier you’ll be. Take this as a challenge. I went through the same thing when I house hacked into a 4plex. Virtually everyone around me looked at me like I was insane. Now that they can guess some appreciation has happened they think I’m brilliant. It will take time, but the best way is to SHOW them they are wrong.
Rental Property Investor · Louisville, KY · Member since 2019 · 37 posts · 61 votes
6y
@Brent Crosby I love the idea of house hacking a fourplex, triplex, or a duplex. Ultimately my first house will be one of those, but I'm not willing to buy one just to say I own x amount of units. I want the right deal, something that will cash flow. I know that as of now family/girlfriend doesn't understand it but when the cash flow really kicks in they'll want a piece of the pie.
Rental Property Investor · Farmington, UT · Member since 2018 · 171 posts · 148 votes
6y
@Jeff Byrne that’s exactly right. The reason I love multiple units is that you are less panicked by vacancy. Tough to find a good deal these days, but with enough hustle can be done.