Getting significant other on board

11 Replies

I can't be the only person on here who has had a problem with getting their significant other on board with real estate investing. I'm in a situation where my wife just isn't into the idea of investing at all and would much rather just have money sitting in a bank account collecting dust. Is there anybody out there who had the same type of problem and found a good way to overcome it? I'm at the point where I want to pull the trigger on a property and my wife has flat out said she'd rather just keep the money in the bank. I have spoken with her before about how I want to invest in Real Estate and she said she was fine with the idea but now that a deal is presenting itself she is saying she doesn't want to do anything and wants to just have the money in the bank. I was thinking about going at it like I was presenting an opportunity to an investor but she is the kind of person that would fade out in about two seconds. Please help.

Hey @Jeffrey Giffin , there have been several really good threads on this.  let me try to post some.

Have you tried putting the #'s down on paper or using BP's calculators to put together a report to show her the #'s?

Maybe go to some open houses together?  See if you can spark an interest or at least let her know it's something you're serious about.

Ok lets see if the links work.  there are 3 or 4 more articles embedded in this article as well.  

Negative energy at home

ForumsStarting OutNegative energy at home

Ok trying again 

http://www.biggerpockets.com/forums/12/topics/119424-negative-energy-at-home , it is not working as a link but try posting it in your URL and see if it works.

Originally posted by @Jerry W. :

Ok trying again 

http://www.biggerpockets.com/forums/12/topics/119424-negative-energy-at-home , it is not working as a link but try posting it in your URL and see if it works.

 Thanks so much Jerry I will definitely read that info tonight when I get home!  

Originally posted by @Shane H. :

Have you tried putting the #'s down on paper or using BP's calculators to put together a report to show her the #'s?

Maybe go to some open houses together?  See if you can spark an interest or at least let her know it's something you're serious about.

 Thanks Shane. That's how I was initially planning on approaching it with a BP spreadsheet and presenting the numbers but as soon as I started to talk numbers her eyes glaze over and she drifts out in about three seconds. Needless to say I handle all of the finances haha

@Jeffrey Giffin

My wife is similar, hopefully if I ever convince her to join BP and share my passion for RE she wont find this thread...ha

I probably had a leg up in that I already had one property when we got together so she's on board for more and has lived through a couple others.

Not sure how you take care of your finances - could always start your own accounts or if you have your own, simply use money out of it, forego a large purchase (upgrading the car etc)

Now might be as good as time as ever to hone your negotiation skills....Good luck!

Thanks @Brad M. for the help.  Technology is not my strong suit.

No problem @Jerry W. ! Good stuff in those links also, thanks.

Hey folks!

So, my girlfriend is apparently pretty interested in learning about REI. I knew she was very supportive, but didn't realize she was genuinely interested. Was so excited to find out!

So, I am trying to figure out how to best introduce her. I am a math/finance/stats/numbers person. I have a bachelor's in mathematics. So, my brain works like that. She is not a math/numbers person so much. That is totally fine! We each have strengths.

My question is this:

What books, blog posts (on BP or not), forum threads do you all know of that would be a good way to really get her up to speed on how REI works? This stuff just clicks with my brain. She is very smart. She is an amazing, hard-working nurse. Just wasn't sure if you all had any recommendations? I am not sure just throwing J. Scott's books or Brandon's books at her would work the best... so I am trying to figure out how to introduce it to her in pieces so I don't overwhelm her. I can be a bit overwhelming when I get excited... so of course I want to give her ALL the books and send links to ALL the blog posts I like... but that won't work the same with her. I will have 30 tabs open in Chrome for 30 different threads I am reading or blog posts and all that... she doesn't like taking in information in that fashion. It is too much at once.

I'm really excited to bring her into all this! I'm not having to get her on board with the idea of me/us doing this. She likes what I have shown her... the numbers... the potential future. Just more on educating her.

Any suggestions?

Thank you!

Free eBook from BiggerPockets!

Ultimate Beginner's Guide Book Cover

Join BiggerPockets and get The Ultimate Beginner's Guide to Real Estate Investing for FREE - read by more than 100,000 people - AND get exclusive real estate investing tips, tricks and techniques delivered straight to your inbox twice weekly!

  • Actionable advice for getting started,
  • Discover the 10 Most Lucrative Real Estate Niches,
  • Learn how to get started with or without money,
  • Explore Real-Life Strategies for Building Wealth,
  • And a LOT more.

Lock We hate spam just as much as you

Join the Largest Real Estate Investing Community

Basic membership is free, forever.

By signing up, you indicate that you agree to the BiggerPockets Terms & Conditions.