Help with a Call Critique and Call Scripts for inbound calls from 4 to 20 unit apartment owners

[Steve Steve]

I'm trying to source a off market deal. I recently sent out 4 letters to the owners of 4 to 20 unit apartment complex owners. I got 1 call. I think I botched it.  Letter is short and sweet "I am interested in purchasing your property. Call me anytime." Call went like this:

My name is XYY, I got your letter.

Me: Hi XYZ, thanks for contacting me. I am an invester looking to purchase an apartment building. To be honest I have sent out a few of these, what is your property address?

xyz street

Me: May I ask you a few questions for the purposes of making an offer?

go ahead

Me: how many units is the building?

x units

Me: are utilities separate?

yes

Me: Based on the information it is definately something I'd like to own.

how much are your offering?

Me: I'd like to meet with you and see one of the units before making an offer. I can't give you an offer without see the building.

oh you want to meet and see an apartment?

Me: Yes, I don't want to make an offer without getting a feel for building in person. When can we meet.

well, i have your info, maybe we can do that sometime.

Me: I am available tomorrow, saturday and sunday. I live 4 towns away and can meet at your convenience.

I have your letter maybe we can do that in the future.

Does anyone have a feel for why things went south?

Can you provide me with some constructive criticism to make future calls better?

Are there any scripts out there you can connect me with?