Need help understanding private lending process

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I would really love if someone could give me a big overview of how the private lending process works. I'm a beginning investor and i see the power of using private funds but i just don't know the proper and legal way of doing this.

now i know about talking to people you know, other investors, and marketing to other high net worth individuals, which all of this i would consider the first step in the process.

the second step i'm guessing some will say is working out the agreement/financial details with the your private lenders once they say they want to invest (which i plan on doing all this in step one, letting them know they're either going to invest as a lender or has a partner and this is what they'll get in either scenario)

but my questions are:

1. when do i have to worry about the SEC?
2. what paperwork will i have to provide to my private lenders for them loaning me money (well loaning the deal money)
3. do i have to file any paperwork with my state in order to use other peoples funds for my deals?
4. when does private placement memorandums come into play