Personal Development

If You Can’t Challenge These Common Self-Defeating Thoughts, You’re Not Ready to Invest

Expertise: Personal Development, Real Estate Wholesaling, Real Estate Investing Basics
96 Articles Written
One standing on the road to future life with many direction sign point in different ways. Decision making is very hard to design.

There is a truth and reality that make this post really difficult to write. It’s because I have to admit something… I’m all over the place.

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Does this come as a shock to you? It shouldn’t, and here’s why.

Let Me Explain

I had a complete awaking this past Sunday evening. I was watching The Potter’s House Live and Bishop T.D. Jakes was discussing the psychological stresses entrepreneurs face. There’s often a huge difference between what you see materialized in your life currently, and what your inner man sees for your future. If you’ve ever been in this position, it’s difficult. Honestly, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what’s going on.

On one hand you’re talking faith and empowerment, believing you can accomplish anything. But on the other hand you’re frightened by what could be.

You’re thinking and saying things like, “I’m not going to let anything stop me from closing my first deal. I GOT THIS!”

And then in the next few moments you’re saying, “What am I doing wrong? I see others posting checks and closing deals. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”

Inside you, there are two voices; it seems like you’re stuck between two paradigms. You know you can do better, but doing better could cause you to fail.

This is the investor’s psychological dichotomy. You’re talking faith and fear at the same time.

Related: 5 Steps That Took Me From Scared Newbie to Accomplished Investor

Frustrated student behind the desk keeping hands on face

Indecision Must Die

I have to say, after listening to Bishop Jakes, it made me realize that most of us are stuck in indecision. Sometimes we listen to one voice and the next moment someone else is speaking to us. We believe we can solve the problem by doing nothing, but that creates more angst. You’re at the crossroads of moving into your destiny and purpose or staying in complacency.

Every entrepreneur has to face this junction in life—to play it safe or jump.

Those who jump are viewed as absurd. The people around them can’t believe they’re going to leave their corporate job. But those who don’t make the plunge live with the regrets of what could’ve been.

Then there are those who know they should make the jump, but they wrestle with self-doubt. Meanwhile, the indecision is killing their health, their relationships, and their finances.

When getting ready to make the leap, most have to contend with adversarial thoughts like these:

  • Am I doing the right thing?
  • What if I fail?
  • How will I pay my bills?
  • What do I do about medical benefits?
  • How will I prepare for retirement?
  • What will my spouse think?
  • How will I afford marketing if I don’t close a deal?

Related: 8 Real Estate Investing Myths That Hold Investors Back—Busted

If you’re not ready to challenge these thoughts and still jump despite not knowing all the answers, stay in your 9 to 5. Those willing to take the leap will jump without knowing all the details. You have to be a little bold to do that.

I’ve made a vow to myself that fear and procrastination will not stop me. To be an entrepreneur, you have to press toward what you know you can accomplish.

Silhouette of male on the mountain. Leadership Concept

Now That You Know, What’s Next?

I urge you to think BIG and dream BIGGER. Don’t let your mind talk you out of what you know is inside you.

If you find yourself dealing with the psychological dichotomy that's so common among real estate investors, it's OK.

In fact, let’s hear some of the thoughts you’re wrestling with! I’m sure you’re not the only one in the community facing these challenges. We can all work together to ease some of the internal struggles we all go through as entrepreneurs.

Can you relate? Want to talk about it? 

Let’s discuss in the comment section below. 

Marcus Maloney is a value investor and portfolio holder of residential and commercial units. He has completed over $3.3 million in wholesale transactions. Currently, Marcus is a licensed agent who ...
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    Rhonda McDaniel from Tulsa, OK
    Replied about 1 year ago
    Following for the feedback. How to kill indecision is my question? So you've gotten started and you know what to do, but you're maybe not indecisive but fear stops you from going forward. Besides rebuking, refuting or yelling at fear. What do you do @Marcus Maloney? I bet the answer is do it scared. I've tried that too. But procrastination can kill your business right up there with indecision and a brother to fear...As a thought. I'd like to hear from others how they have overcome and how they keep overcoming. Blessings!
    Solomon Morris Rental Property Investor from Maryland
    Replied about 1 year ago
    @rhonda mcdaniel I imagined myself in the future after neglecting to jump on opportunities. Chances are you understand the race you're currently running right? I bet I can guess your situation! You supply some sort of product or service for work returning approx X amount per year after taxes. Just maybe you'll be blessed to go the distance for some sort of retirement benefit giving you a percentage of X per year afterwards. Maybe you've received a small bonus or raise before and might receive another in the future for your diligent work. That's a comfortable pace and one you understand right? Can I challenge you? If not real estate then what? Why not take a CALCULATED approach with your (or someone else's!!) personal assets and utilize a system (real estate) that's been proven to derive great returns over the long haul?
    Chris Courteau from Buffalo, New York
    Replied about 1 year ago
    Honestly, I watched as friends house hacked and were able to be so free for years. The wife quit her job to raise their kids and that was my last straw because I miss my kids all day while I’m at work. I set goals with timelines, I wanted to have my first duplex in 2019. Then my goal is to have 5 total in 6 years. I purchased my first in June. Now I’m trying to figure out my next step but I just keep telling myself that I’ll figure it out. I still work my day job as one duplex cannot replace my income but I take pride in taking my first step.
    Ahmed Magdy from Egypt
    Replied about 1 year ago
    Not all entrepreneurs are renegade risk takers. Some are quite calculated in every move. Besides, entrepreneurship doesn't have to be all-or-nothing matter. You can have a shot at it in parallel with your 9 to 5 job. I'm actually trying to do that at the moment. Come on, entrepreneurship !!! :)
    Scott Travis
    Replied about 1 year ago
    I've been reading, listening, studying, and talking. I know I have a firm grasp on the mechanics but I just can't work up the nerve. I went into other ventures with little to no financial cushion and lost my shirt, trousers and hat. I think what will help is finding a mentor I can shadow and learn from (and return the favor in any way I can) will give me the confidence I need. It's a lot like jumping off a high bridge into the water like we did when we were kids. It looks like certain death until you see your buddy do it, then all of a sudden it doesn't seem hard at all and you leap with almost no fear. If anyone is willing to take on an eager student with handyman skills in the Lakeland, FL area, give a shout.
    Whit Beans
    Replied about 1 year ago
    This is my living nightmare. One week I am 100% confident I’ve done the research, know the risks, and can navigate the landscape. The next I’m listening to a coworker or friend call me crazy, question my ability, or ask me why I can’t just be happy with a good job and a normal life. Outside pressure continues to act like an anchor. SMH
    Omar Bunch from Hardin County, KY
    Replied about 1 year ago
    I wrestle almost every day with exactly what you wrote about! The two voices thing is killing me. The fact that I am struggling to get my first deal compounds that reality. Despite it all, my hope and faith are just as strong as ever. I truly believe that I was introduced to this business model for a purpose that is associated with achieving financial freedom. Yes, there are moments of question but they are usually followed almost immediately with my "why". This article was one of those reinforcement moments. Thank you for yet another great and timely article, Marcus!
    David Yee from Queens, NY
    Replied about 1 year ago
    Hopefully I can help someone with my limited experience. Marcus' post about the two voices reminds me of what Jerzy Gregorek referred to in Tribe of Mentors as the "fatalist" and the "master". On is constantly trying to sabotage you while the other is trying to empower you. For me the two opposing voices constantly cause me anxiety. This was especially true on my last/current deal. From the time I put it under contract until I stabilized the property over a period of ~15 months, emotionally I thought I made a terrible mistake. I constantly had to remind myself of the numbers until the "master" voice was vindicated. Now the property is doing well and I'm about to refinance out of the hard money loan. My advice is "do it scared but do it smart". Forgot who said this but it was basically - Its okay to not leave your comfort zone, you can grow your comfort zone to fit your dreams inside.
    Nate Sanow Real Estate Agent from Tulsa, OK
    Replied about 1 year ago
    Great thoughts!
    Todd Wilson
    Replied about 1 year ago
    I've got my first property already. I had my property for roughly a year. To move forward I need the help of a hard money lender. I'm just nervous I'll screw it up. Plus I keep trying to find a property and I'm having trouble doing that.
    Phil Hucke
    Replied about 1 year ago
    I danced around investing for a number of years. I'd find a property that looked like a good deal, then talk myself right out of going for it. I could never see how to make it work with my day job. The deal would pass, and hindsight would start kicking my butt. Should have gone for it, chicken! Well, a deal popped up that WOULD work for a first go, and even though I still don't know how I did it, I formed an llc, got it under contract, got financing in place, closed on it, and I'm rolling forward. Plenty of people have called me crazy, especially those who have seen the condition of the property, but a few who know the industry have looked at it and given me a thumbs up. I'm grinding out sweat equity on this one, learning what works for me, and hoping for a bright future. For me, it's been a combination of being patient for the right deal, and being almost recklesly impulsive when the right one showed up.
    Marvin Lusky New to Real Estate from Aventura, FL
    Replied about 1 year ago
    I’ve been an entrepreneur for 38 years, except for 2 years after my mom passed when I got a property management job. After 2 nightmarish years, I finally decided it was time to get back to doing my own thing even if it meant failure. The 2 voices have always been there, I just figured out which one to listen to. As long as I weigh the pros & cons and have a business plan to work with, I jump at the opportunity. Of course, I do my due diligence & ask my attorney, accountant, and most importantly my wife. Is it hard in the beginning? Hell yes! Are there sleepless nights? Yes! Am I scared? Absolutely Etc, etc, etc. I’ve run multiple businesses, 3 of them I knew nothing about including my current business that came out of the property management job. It’s scary if you try to dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s. I have always just looked at the big picture, can I make a profit? Do I have someone I can call if I have a question? After that, I hit the ground running. If you’re interested in hearing more about being an entrepreneur, give me a shout.
    Jessica Roland Investor from Atlantic, IA
    Replied about 1 year ago
    It's encouraging to read this and everyone's comments. My husband quit his full-time job so we could focus on real estate completely almost 2 months ago. His job didn't pay well, and after making as much flipping one house as he made in a year at his full time, the job was feeling like a waste of time. We have a house on the market to sell, enough money in our business line of credit to finish up another flip, and cash for probably one more month. With 5 kids! But we love what we're doing and know if we can get past this, it will be well worth it. Doing what you love and having more time to spend with family is wonderful.