Why have others given up? (conversation starter)

66 Replies

Good evening all,

   Just trying to get a conversation started about why others have given up in the past. I know many people who are interested in real estate, some pursue it, but many many decide not to do it after a little bit. Two of my friends did this, and their reason was mostly the same, they didn't know what to do next. 

What would you all say is the biggest reason (you have seen) that keeps people from getting started??

Cheers,

Andrew

@Andrew Angerer they start with unrealistic expectations. They find out the reality, it is hard, it takes money, it has risk.

Money....or lack of edcucating oneself, would play two large roles in my opinion.

Very true, I think risk seems to be a big issue for many people to invest at all. 

simply put......their "why" isnt strong enough........I just dove in wholesaling.....because my "Why" was so strong.......

I hate excuses and so many people make excuses.......

@Andrew Angerer

They didn't plan well enough

They thought it was a "get rich quick" scheme

They weren't driven to begin with

They realized that it takes money, which they didnt have

They didnt have the right mindset

They didnt educate themselves

There are 1000s of reasons why people dont follow through. There's always a reason NOT to do something.

Originally posted by @Jason D. :

@Andrew Angerer

They didn't plan well enough

They thought it was a "get rich quick" scheme

They weren't driven to begin with

They realized that it takes money, which they didnt have

They didnt have the right mindset

They didnt educate themselves

There are 1000s of reasons why people dont follow through. There's always a reason NOT to do something.

 There are always reasons not to do anything, you have to find that why to really get into it.

Originally posted by @Andrew Angerer :
What would you all say is the biggest reason (you have seen) that keeps people from getting started??

Reality. The reality that most of time it really IS hard to do this. The reality that most of the time you can not do pie in the sky 0% deals - you need 20% down. The reality that it takes time to find a good deal that sustains itself. The reality that you need to do a LOT of homework that was never taught to you before. The reality that thinking like an investor is something that is not taught in school. The reality that it is difficult to do this in your spare time. 

They didn't have the secret sauce that makes special people special. They were measured, they were weighed, and they were found lacking. We on the other hand, we're different. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers...

And no, my arm never gets tired from patting myself on the back as I endlessly convince myself of my innate superiority in all ways.

For those just starting out, it’s really easy to feel like the opportunity to make money in the housing market is lost. I can remember 5 years ago bigger pockets podcasts talking about how the market was tight. And it’s much much tighter now. I see people who’ve been buying property for a decade say the market is too hot to make money right now. 

Its easy to feel defeated before even starting. Like it’s stacked against you

Like with everything in business and life.  Lack of will power.  Will power alone can make you successful.  

I think people need to understand that real estate is a long term game.  It doesn't happen overnight and the little rewards you see in the first 5yrs will start to pay off in yrs 10-12. 

Originally posted by @Jim K. :

They didn't have the secret sauce that makes special people special. They were measured, they were weighed, and they were found lacking. We on the other hand, we're different. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers...

And no, my arm never gets tired from patting myself on the back as I endlessly convince myself of my innate superiority in all ways.

Well said, and yes,we are all brothers and sisters that are making it in this world of real estate investing.

Originally posted by @Frank Wong :

Like with everything in business and life.  Lack of will power.  Will power alone can make you successful.  

I think people need to understand that real estate is a long term game.  It doesn't happen overnight and the little rewards you see in the first 5yrs will start to pay off in yr 8-10. 

 I think too many people now expect instant gratification and thinking that money is 8 years away feels like impossible money, even if it is passive income.

Originally posted by @Benjamin Bleasdale :

For those just starting out, it’s really easy to feel like the opportunity to make money in the housing market is lost. I can remember 5 years ago bigger pockets podcasts talking about how the market was tight. And it’s much much tighter now. I see people who’ve been buying property for a decade say the market is too hot to make money right now. 

Its easy to feel defeated before even starting. Like it’s stacked against you

 I have a friend who claims to know the market super well, he has been predicting a market crash since 2013 and every year since. The market has been constantly appreciating in my area and no recession yet. It is hard to predict, and deals are hard to find but not impossible.We just have to fight the the scarcity mindset. 

Originally posted by @Andrew Angerer :
Originally posted by @Jason DiClemente:

@Andrew Angerer

They didn't plan well enough

They thought it was a "get rich quick" scheme

They weren't driven to begin with

They realized that it takes money, which they didnt have

They didnt have the right mindset

They didnt educate themselves

There are 1000s of reasons why people dont follow through. There's always a reason NOT to do something.

 There are always reasons not to do anything, you have to find that why to really get into it.

 Some other shiny object catches their limited attention span.

Originally posted by @Mike M. :
Originally posted by @Andrew Angerer:
Originally posted by @Jason DiClemente:

@Andrew Angerer

They didn't plan well enough

They thought it was a "get rich quick" scheme

They weren't driven to begin with

They realized that it takes money, which they didnt have

They didnt have the right mindset

They didnt educate themselves

There are 1000s of reasons why people dont follow through. There's always a reason NOT to do something.

 There are always reasons not to do anything, you have to find that why to really get into it.

 Some other shiny object catches their limited attention span.

Like watching dancing with the stars for hours and hours. 

It might behoove us to remember that the worst mass shooting on American soil was executed by none other than a real estate investor.

Maybe people who put money in real estate are not so special after all.

I think the biggest issue people have is the inability to take action. They get stuck in a state of analysis paralysis afraid to move forward because of potential mistakes.  They constantly analyze thinking that if they prepare enough, no mistake will ever be made, but they are never prepared enough to move forward.

Originally posted by @Bill Plymouth :

I think the biggest issue people have is the inability to take action. They get stuck in a state of analysis paralysis afraid to move forward because of potential mistakes.  They constantly analyze thinking that if they prepare enough, no mistake will ever be made, but they are never prepared enough to move forward.

 Do you think this has to do with emotional response to owning property?? The more I learn about real estate investing the more I believe that anyone can do it as long as they can set their emotions aside. Do we live in an over-analytical era?

There are a lot more DREAMERs than there are DOers.

A lot of people DREAM of being a successful Real Estate Investor.

They claim to be very motivated. BUT, when it actually comes to DOING.... they never pull the trigger.

Even making a small mistake and learning from it is still better than never having done anything at all.

I remember reading about the psychology of happiness when it comes to vacations.

If you break down the vacation into two phases, the Planning Phase and the actual Vacation Phase, the majority of people are happier in the PLANNING phase.

That's because they day dream of a PERFECT vacation where it never rains, the hotel doesn't have bugs or the AC is never broken, etc.

To me, that's like a lot of beginner Real Estate Investors. They are so happy dreaming about being a Successful Real Estate Investor that when it comes to actually doing the HARD work of making it happen they fail to LIVE the Dream. They are most happy in their fantasy of what it's like to be a successful Real Estate Investor.

It's the same for those that want to be a highly skilled professional. For instance, many may dream of being a Medical Doctor.

So they may even enroll in College but when they hit the Organic Chemistry course, it weeds them right out. They don't have the true motivation, determination or discipline to live their dreams.

I have come to accept that fact among my friends, family and students.

Originally posted by @Kerry Noble Jr :

simply put......their "why" isnt strong enough........I just dove in wholesaling.....because my "Why" was so strong.......

 Tell us sir, what is your why? I think you have a good reason, the room is dying to know what is driving you so maybe we could capture a little bit of it and apply it to our lives. 

Originally posted by @Llewelyn A. :

There are a lot more DREAMERs than there are DOers.

A lot of people DREAM of being a successful Real Estate Investor.

They claim to be very motivated. BUT, when it actually comes to DOING.... they never pull the trigger.

Even making a small mistake and learning from it is still better than never having done anything at all.

I remember reading about the psychology of happiness when it comes to vacations.

If you break down the vacation into two phases, the Planning Phase and the actual Vacation Phase, the majority of people are happier in the PLANNING phase.

That's because they day dream of a PERFECT vacation where it never rains, the hotel doesn't have bugs or the AC is never broken, etc.

To me, that's like a lot of beginner Real Estate Investors. They are so happy dreaming about being a Successful Real Estate Investor that when it comes to actually doing the HARD work of making it happen they fail to LIVE the Dream. They are most happy in their fantasy of what it's like to be a successful Real Estate Investor.

It's the same for those that want to be a highly skilled professional. For instance, many may dream of being a Medical Doctor.

So they may even enroll in College but when they hit the Organic Chemistry course, it weeds them right out. They don't have the true motivation, determination or discipline to live their dreams.

I have come to accept that fact among my friends, family and students.

 Well said, taking and passing organic chemistry made me a man. I think you hit the nail on the head. Although easier said than done, doing is way more important than dreaming. That is why I have been taking real world action steps towards furthering my real estate investing goals. Please tell me what your latest action steps have been. 

one reason is too narrow focus.. IE they only think of one thing and that is rentals.. while the majority thinks this way its market specific and in some markets its exceedingly difficult to make any real money with out proper capitalization. Its one thing to be working in a market were rental houses are the price of used cars.. and another to be working in a market were rentals houses are the prices of Bentley and Ferrari's etc.  to use an auto analogy. 

or they drink the wholesaling cool aid  again a very tough thing to do for those starting out.

there are many many ways to make money in real estate

and some ways are more suited to certain personalities and or financial strengths/weakness's. 

@Andrew Angerer I don't think it is the emotions that come with property ownership.  I think it is the feelings of regret that come from making mistakes.  Venturing into new waters means a lot of potential mistakes.  Over-analysis is essentially a security blanket.  It gives people the illusion of productivity while saving them from making the mistakes that will inevitably happen when trying something new.  I believe that most people are over analytical. 

Free eBook from BiggerPockets!

Ultimate Beginner's Guide Book Cover

Join BiggerPockets and get The Ultimate Beginner's Guide to Real Estate Investing for FREE - read by more than 100,000 people - AND get exclusive real estate investing tips, tricks and techniques delivered straight to your inbox twice weekly!

  • Actionable advice for getting started,
  • Discover the 10 Most Lucrative Real Estate Niches,
  • Learn how to get started with or without money,
  • Explore Real-Life Strategies for Building Wealth,
  • And a LOT more.

Lock We hate spam just as much as you

Create Lasting Wealth Through Real Estate

Join the millions of people achieving financial freedom through the power of real estate investing

Start here