Grove City, PA · Member since 2019 · 21 posts · 26 votes
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
Thank you for taking time to look over my post,
D'Andre
D'Andre, here's something I always ask about situations like these:
Have you asked her what HER strategy for the financial health of your family entails? Does she have a plan? Is her plan to live in a nice starter home that keeps up with the Joneses and drive nice new starter cars that keep with the Joneses and have expenses that keep up with the Joneses as you both strive and strive to provide more income to keep up with the Joneses...and that you do these things as you expand the Byers family, member by member, and grow the Byers budget, lifestyle-creep-expense by lifestyle-creep-expense?
Because if that's what she wants out of life, I can give you the names of a dozen broke-a$$ simps in their forties with wives just like that.
I do have a grandfather who is now retired and was a doctor for about 30 years. I do believe that he used to own a few condos in Hilton Head. You’re right though, I will talk to him tomorrow.
@Bryan S. Is the starter home for you to live in? If so, then buy something where the numbers also work for a rental down the road. Do 5% down, because you will be living in it, and in a few years, convince her that she needs to move to a slightly bigger home and keep this one as a rental.
Good luck with the wedding-hopefully you can keep costs down.
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
Thank you for taking time to look over my post,
D'Andre
D'Andre, here's something I always ask about situations like these:
Have you asked her what HER strategy for the financial health of your family entails? Does she have a plan? Is her plan to live in a nice starter home that keeps up with the Joneses and drive nice new starter cars that keep with the Joneses and have expenses that keep up with the Joneses as you both strive and strive to provide more income to keep up with the Joneses...and that you do these things as you expand the Byers family, member by member, and grow the Byers budget, lifestyle-creep-expense by lifestyle-creep-expense?
Because if that's what she wants out of life, I can give you the names of a dozen broke-a$$ simps in their forties with wives just like that.
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
Thank you for taking time to look over my post,
D'Andre
Not knowing how these arguments are being structured currently I might offer showing her the math. Show her that you can both retire in your 30's if you start at 21. Show her that the planning you are already doing for the future and family you plan to have with her is to provide the best life no matter what happens. Explain that for a little struggle today you can have the world tomorrow.
Maybe sit her down and watch a few of Brandon's videos on Youtube or this site if you can access them. Show her something concrete as well, actually have a property that you are thinking of to show her so the example isn't abstracted. You could make it a couple activity as well, you could go driving for dollars together. You might also appeal to her desires individually, maybe she loves decorating the houses, or maybe she has a dream vacation, or whatever else; whatever it is let her take over that part of the business or promise after the investment is made you can enjoy the reward.
If you are a buy and hold reserve some of the cashflow as a reward for you both to enjoy, explain that you can enjoy more of life if you invest than if you don't. That's all I can think of, I really hope this is the beginning of your journey together not the end of your journey alone.
What we find with young kids is as soon as they become young mothers they would prefer to stay at home & raise their children rather than the drudgery (& logistical nightmare) of working to pay the ever increasing expense of daycare & after-school care until one of the parents rushes home. This accepted modern day living arrangement alienates many parents from the youngest days of their kids lives & they miss so many firsts as they 'grow up'. Maybe if you approach your venture into REI with that in mind it could be an 'OMG' moment for her.
We helped a young couple who now enjoy just living off their rents & have 4 under 6 yrs old. We often see the wife up to her elbows in dust & drywall mud or strolling the aisles of Lowes, but loving it.
We even introduced this concept to a young grandmother. She intimated to us that she wanted to cut back her lucrative practice & spend time with the grandkids instead of them being 'incarcerated & infected' (her words) at the local o/crowded o/priced daycare center. She jumped into REI with her husband & they are having a blast. It's never too late & you will never regret it nor forget the freedom & memories it opens up.
I’ve never thought of putting it that way for her. That’s a good question to ask that maybe can get the ball rolling and some actual conversation about it.
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
Thank you for taking time to look over my post,
D'Andre
Not knowing how these arguments are being structured currently I might offer showing her the math. Show her that you can both retire in your 30's if you start at 21. Show her that the planning you are already doing for the future and family you plan to have with her is to provide the best life no matter what happens. Explain that for a little struggle today you can have the world tomorrow.
Maybe sit her down and watch a few of Brandon's videos on Youtube or this site if you can access them. Show her something concrete as well, actually have a property that you are thinking of to show her so the example isn't abstracted. You could make it a couple activity as well, you could go driving for dollars together. You might also appeal to her desires individually, maybe she loves decorating the houses, or maybe she has a dream vacation, or whatever else; whatever it is let her take over that part of the business or promise after the investment is made you can enjoy the reward.
If you are a buy and hold reserve some of the cashflow as a reward for you both to enjoy, explain that you can enjoy more of life if you invest than if you don't. That's all I can think of, I really hope this is the beginning of your journey together not the end of your journey alone.
Those are a lot of great ideas!! I like the "appeal to her individual desires" I had not actually thought of doing that. That might at least get her to show some semblance of interest. Although, I really like the idea of doing it as a couple. That's my endgame if I can somehow get her on board. I will try these ideas as soon as I get home!
I’ve never thought of putting it that way for her. That’s a good question to ask that maybe can get the ball rolling and some actual conversation about it.
Thank you for the insight!
D’Andre
I find myself constantly on this topic of working with your spouse here on Bigger Pockets. My wife actually pushed me into rental property ownership. She brought in our first deal and insisted that we do it. I'm the one that posts on Bigger Pockets, but my wife is my business partner in all ways.
I honestly think that you should go with @Pat L.'s approach first, though. My approach accuses, it probes for weakness, it is often unfair. This is probably because I am at an age where I have multiple long-term friends and family members that are stuck by their financial decisions in offices now for life, with no chance to retire early. They're grinding away for their next paycheck, grinding away for their next one-week $5,700 family vacation to Disney World (that is the actual average cost), living in ridiculously oversized houses with multiple shiny new cars, practically nothing in savings, lucky if they're putting away the pitiful employee match amounts on their retirement accounts. Their wives routinely post pics of their well-scrubbed, well-turned-out kids on Facebook, Instagram shots of their youngest babies, all to cooing approving comments from their moms...and I can't help but think the wives are obviously living their middle-class dreams with the right mule plowing away in the background to fund it all.
Pat's been doing this a long longer than I have. Listen to him.
What we find with young kids is as soon as they become young mothers they would prefer to stay at home & raise their children rather than the drudgery (& logistical nightmare) of working to pay the ever increasing expense of daycare & after-school care until one of the parents rushes home. This accepted modern day living arrangement alienates many parents from the youngest days of their kids lives & they miss so many firsts as they 'grow up'. Maybe if you approach your venture into REI with that in mind it could be an 'OMG' moment for her.
We helped a young couple who now enjoy just living off their rents & have 4 under 6 yrs old. We often see the wife up to her elbows in dust & drywall mud or strolling the aisles of Lowes, but loving it.
We even introduced this concept to a young grandmother. She intimated to us that she wanted to cut back her lucrative practice & spend time with the grandkids instead of them being 'incarcerated & infected' (her words) at the local o/crowded o/priced daycare center. She jumped into REI with her husband & they are having a blast. It's never too late & you will never regret it nor forget the freedom & memories it opens up.
Good luck!!!
Pat, it's funny you mentioned this because this is a sort of argument that I had structured towards the beginning of me talking to her about REI. It seemed that she was not too worried about kids being in a daycare. Particularly because she had been in daycare when she was a child. However, I was watched in my childhood by my mother and grandparents and tried to assure her it was a more meaningful experience for me as a child than going to daycare.
Do you think there are any ways to "show" her that it COULD be a better situation if we were to raise our own kids rather than put them in daycare? I feel that she isn't responding well to the whole kid argument simply because we don't have any at the moment.
It’s weird because the rate at which we are going, we are well on track to becoming that family. Before I stumbled upon BP that’s exactly what I had to look forward to. But now knowing that something such as financial freedom exists, I just know that We can’t continue on like we have been. I’m so thankful that I found this community when I’m 21 and not when I was 31 or even 41. It’s opened my eyes in many ways and all I want to do is create actual lifetime security for my family rather than the false sense of security the rate race implies.
@D'Andre Byers there’s been some great advice here for you. Like you, I was engaged at 21, married at 22. We bought a basic 3/2 ranch well within our budget. I sort of wanted a 2 family, but she didn’t. But I also didn’t really want to “share” my house/yard with another person. Looking back, I wish we had done that for at least a year and then moved on to another 2-4 family and repeated the process for a couple years. I didn’t know of this site 10+ years ago otherwise I’d probably be retired by now.
Anyway, we bought our primary home at 22 and a few years later bought the house next to us. And then another rental a couple years later. My wife isn’t thrilled about RE like I am, but she knows the possibilities since I talk about it often.
Maybe wait until your wife has a TERRIBLE day at work and ask her if she would like to “never have to work again” or just work a job she loves and not have to worry about how much money she makes. I also like the idea of taking a vacation/buying her something special whenever you buy a rental property. Good luck!
I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.
I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge. I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.
She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.
I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.
Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.
Thank you for taking time to look over my post,
D'Andre
Great thread. I guess I will share my experience as well. When I met my wife I already owned two rental properties. She has only known me as an investor, so it does not surprise her what I am doing. Keeping that in mind, she doesn't understand real estate investing very well and doesn't care to learn anything about it. She will go look at houses with me an occasionally helps with rehab work, but in general it just isn't her thing.
I believe that she is skeptical for a number of reasons. You said it yourself that you haven't started investing yet. In her mind it is just talk, she sees no benefit from investing because there is no income, there is no wealth being created, it is still just an idea in your head. Not only that, but you spent all of your down payment money on a ring.
It is probably hard for her to take you seriously as an investor and get on board when you haven't even started yet.
I had the dream of buying a duplex every other year and living in one side and renting out the other until I had enough to retire, but that dream has passed since getting married. Most of the properties that made financial sense don’t provide sense of security. Security is a woman’s highest need! A home is a woman’s place of security, so is money in the bank as a nest egg “in case of emergencies” I personally don’t feel safe with a nest egg in the bank I feel safe with an income producing asset. My advise to you is to not give up on the dream, but make adjustments. Get to know your wife’s basic needs and provide her with information in a way that she can understand and accept. Share your vision with her slowly, be patient. Patients give birth to something great. Instead of buying we let our nest egg grow and in the mean time we started a property management company in Dallas which provides us with income and lead generation! My wife is a sales guru so she has taught me so many qualities that I apply to my real estate company. I could go on but I’ll leave it at that. Hope it helps and congratulations! Hears some comedic relief. I wanted some backyard chickens for eggs and such, but she’s afraid they the dog will kill them. A wise told me to tell her this, “When life gives you a dead chicken make fried chicken!”
@D'Andre Byers I'm in a similar situation. The only difference is I am married, just bought the house and have the kid before I discovered REI. My only solution is to find a side hustle that you can do to earn extra income. Before you do inform your wife that since this is extra income that you don't need to live you will be saving it to invest in real estate (you should also mention that you'll spend some on her). This way she can get her house and with a good side hustle earning a few thousand a month you could be ready to buy a property with low or no money down in a few years, which would still put you far ahead of the game. Hope that helps.
What we find with young kids is as soon as they become young mothers they would prefer to stay at home & raise their children rather than the drudgery (& logistical nightmare) of working to pay the ever increasing expense of daycare & after-school care until one of the parents rushes home. This accepted modern day living arrangement alienates many parents from the youngest days of their kids lives & they miss so many firsts as they 'grow up'. Maybe if you approach your venture into REI with that in mind it could be an 'OMG' moment for her.
We helped a young couple who now enjoy just living off their rents & have 4 under 6 yrs old. We often see the wife up to her elbows in dust & drywall mud or strolling the aisles of Lowes, but loving it.
We even introduced this concept to a young grandmother. She intimated to us that she wanted to cut back her lucrative practice & spend time with the grandkids instead of them being 'incarcerated & infected' (her words) at the local o/crowded o/priced daycare center. She jumped into REI with her husband & they are having a blast. It's never too late & you will never regret it nor forget the freedom & memories it opens up.
Good luck!!!
Pat, it's funny you mentioned this because this is a sort of argument that I had structured towards the beginning of me talking to her about REI. It seemed that she was not too worried about kids being in a daycare. Particularly because she had been in daycare when she was a child. However, I was watched in my childhood by my mother and grandparents and tried to assure her it was a more meaningful experience for me as a child than going to daycare.
Do you think there are any ways to "show" her that it COULD be a better situation if we were to raise our own kids rather than put them in daycare? I feel that she isn't responding well to the whole kid argument simply because we don't have any at the moment.
Thank you for taking time to reply!
D'Andre
What about the opportunity for you to stay at home with the kids if you'd rather them not go to daycare? I have a friend whose husband did this and he loved it (as did the kids and her).
If you have the ways and means to invest at the age of 21, you should. It doesn't make sense to do the "norm" and its good you have that mindset. If I were you I would just fund it myself and do what makes the most sense financially. If she is on board, good. If not, then she has a choice. You will find out sooner or later if shes willing to trust you and ride it out.
@D'Andre Byers super common issue. Just keep talking about it and learning about it and at some point she will likely come around. That being said if she has different long term goals than you and are not yet married then you also need to consider carefully about why you want to marry her.
Not saying you shouldn't but it's important for a relationship that you both be happy and if she will never be happy with rei and you won't be happy with out it you might be in for a long road.
Did your wife put up any fuss about RE when you first started talking about it? My fiancé is not completely against investing so to speak. She’s more concerned with how she’s going to spend her money once she gets a raise at work. Whereas I’m more concerned with saving the extra money we both will make once we get those raises. We both have very good jobs, she works for the government and I work in heavy highway construction (management) where we both can and will get raises. But my goal is to save more of the money that we both make and continue live like we are now which isn’t crazy and above our means.
And sometimes I feel that maybe she thinks I’m trying to take over her personal finances and do what I want instead of what’s good for us in the long term. Did you ever feel like that and if you did, how did you convince her of your actual intentions?
However, I want the first property that we buy to be thought of as an investment and not our “forever home.” Meaning, I don’t want the house to be newly fully renovated and pristine. Rather, I could picture a fixer-upper that could use some updating but nothing crazy. She’s on the other side of things.
What did the conversations look like when you started buying other rentals after you purchased your first home?
You are right! I can completely understand the concept that it’s still just an idea in my head. That would kind of turn me away as well if the roles were reversed. Actions always speak louder than words in these situations.
If the roles were reversed in your situation, what would it take for you to hop on board with REI? Curious to see if maybe there is something that I'm not thinking about.
We are both math people so if I can sort of coax her into looking into it with me based on that it could be a small win. But after that I’m sort of drawing blanks. I have gotten some other ideas from this thread but if there is anything else you haven’t seen yet, I’d be curious to know what they are!
Wow there is a lot of great advice in this post!! Thank you for putting it this way for me. I feel like sometimes as a guy I can’t always put myself in her shoes like she might do mine. Maybe I’ve just been asking the questions wrong and can rephrase them into something that would show that I’m coming from a genuine place rather than just a business standpoint. I really appreciate your post! It’s definitely changed how I’m going to come at the conversations in the future, it’s given me a lot to think about.
Shaun, finding a side hustle is something I've been working on for MONTHS now. Even before REI came into the picture. My only obstacle with this is that I work construction and my hours are constantly inconsistent. Some days I have an hour drive to and from work and others I may have a 2 hour drive. On top of that, I never know how long the days work is going to last. The best part about it too, is that getting weekends off is never a given. So I could be working 5-6 days a week with only Sunday's off. The WORST part is that I'm salary. So it doesn't matter if I work 20 hours or 75 hours a week. Still getting the same pay.
So, my options become severely limited due to the time constraints my work puts on me. I’d need a side hustle that I could do from home or from my work truck in my spare time.
My question to you is: do you know of any side hustle jobs that would allow me to work on MY time and from wherever? I realize this is a broad question and I’m not putting it on you to do my due diligence. I just haven’t seem to come across anything that allows me to do what I can and am wondering if maybe you’ve ever come across something like that.
At 21 years of age there is usually a deeper layer to discuss versus investing in real estate.
Often pre-marital counseling can be a big benefit. There are lot's of things couples do not fully think about before getting married. Essentially you both are taking the good, the bad, the ugly legacy issues you potentially have individually and with your generations of families and blending into a new combined unit going forward.
Imagine carrying a sack of weighted down junk that tires you down and every once in awhile you look into it to see what is so heavy but then close the bag back up because you do not want to do deal with it right now so keep carrying it. Knowingly or unknowingly that baggage can be an extension of who you are in subtle ways and not so subtle ways until it's dealt with in a constructive and positive manner.
You might both need to sit down and have a vision board. See what each side envisions over the next year,5 years, 10 years, etc.
You might have for instance 80% importance on financial independence and will do almost whatever it takes to get there. She might see it as something nice to have but not willing to give up lots of items she sees as more important (marriage, kids, etc.) to get there. Money can be a positive if it doesn't take over your life in a negative way. I would rather have a balanced life growing the money the way my wife and I agree to then making faster returns but leaving collateral damage in other aspects of my life. Some people do whatever it takes to become multi-millionaires but then are left with next to nothing in other life categories and are miserable. Lots of people out there with money that are miserable. The happy clients I have light up about their travels, kids, spouse, friends, etc. with happiness. They love that money gives them the freedom to live the life they have imagined but do not obsess about or love money. Instead they love what it can do for them.
When people are in their 20's getting married sometimes the reasons behind getting married are not the right ones. Sometimes it's getting away from the parents, proving to the parents they are an adult now, issues with being alone and happy within themselves and the need to constantly be around someone to make them feel like they matter. Getting married does not have to be expensive starting out. My wife and I had an amazing wedding many years ago. One of our friends did the photography and video for the wedding. Other family members did the decorations at the church. The church we were a member of so charged very minimal for the grounds and reception areas. A family member let us stay at their cabin in the mountains in GA for free and then we stayed at a hotel in Gatlinburg for the rest of the week on our honeymoon. All in we spent maybe 4,000 including the trip. Her mom bought her the wedding gown.
Most of the population in the world will die poor living paycheck to paycheck.
If you calculate just college student debt, getting married, having kids, buying cars for transportation, health insurance, having a house, food, clothing, etc. the system is designed for the public to make just enough to survive to live another day. Especially if for example you each make 50k a year.
There has to be some HUGE event happen for people to truly get ahead such as (inheritance, selling of the business, career with very high incomes such as surgeons, etc. , accumulating properties at bottom of the market for big equity gains etc.)
Ongoing rental cash flow is a slow investors game to hopefully wealth but the reality is to achieve enough to stop working is very difficult. For example if you need 100k a year then that is 1,000,000 a year free and clear at a 10% return pre-tax. The time it could take you working a 50k job to pay for other life's demands and get there could be a slow grind of 20 to 30 years. By then the 100k potential cash flow is not worth 100k but maybe 65k to 70k in future dollars. Who knows what the world will be like 20 to 30 years from now or what our lives will look like. I am not a fan of these guru's selling books saying live like a miserable miser for 25 years and THEN you might have some wealth. They are making money off of the public at large selling this junk. You have to enjoy today because tomorrow is never promised in this life. I live in the moment to the fullest everyday. I plan for the future but do not suffer today to make something happen tomorrow that may never exist. Now I do live a more balanced life. I tend to not spend above my means.
You might look at a life plan such as some people do like 30% live on income, 25% taxes, 45% invest. If the job you have does not pay much see how fast you can move up in that field to make more or if there is something else you are more passionate about doing. You could go work for an investment firm and then have the senior partners eventually start you off offering a small slice of equity to you. They typically have to see you are motivated to learn and succeed.
Right now you might want to do the couples counseling ahead of time before even getting into the real estate stuff. If you are not on the same page with other life goals then the real estate is not going to gel well and constantly be fighting with the other things instead of complementing things. You have to get away from an EITHER/OR and get to a middle ground you both will be happy and feel great about as a life plan being a couple.
Shaun, finding a side hustle is something I've been working on for MONTHS now. Even before REI came into the picture. My only obstacle with this is that I work construction and my hours are constantly inconsistent. Some days I have an hour drive to and from work and others I may have a 2 hour drive. On top of that, I never know how long the days work is going to last. The best part about it too, is that getting weekends off is never a given. So I could be working 5-6 days a week with only Sunday's off. The WORST part is that I'm salary. So it doesn't matter if I work 20 hours or 75 hours a week. Still getting the same pay.
So, my options become severely limited due to the time constraints my work puts on me. I’d need a side hustle that I could do from home or from my work truck in my spare time.
My question to you is: do you know of any side hustle jobs that would allow me to work on MY time and from wherever? I realize this is a broad question and I’m not putting it on you to do my due diligence. I just haven’t seem to come across anything that allows me to do what I can and am wondering if maybe you’ve ever come across something like that.
Thank you for the recommendation!
D’Andre
That’s a good question. That would be difficult. I’m not sure what your interests are, but you definitely would have to do some sort of online freelance or self started online business. I heard of one guy who started a podcast on his commute to work, so there are definitely options. If you haven’t already, look into side hustle Nation with Nick loper. This link is a good place to start
