First Postcard mailing.. Critique my card

[Ceasar Blackman]

Hey everyone i bit the bullet and bought a new list of absentee owners spread over 3 zip code in Orlando. My criteria was Absentee owners, 3+ bedroom, ownership 15 years plus, omit trustees. I skipped equity for cost reason, but figured the length of ownership would be good enough.

I ended up mailing 932 letters and got 4 voicemails, 1 person was mad about getting a card, next wouldn't return my call and the other 2 didn't need to sell so they were asking for way too much to wholesale. Surpirsingly in total i only got about 6 calls. Out of the whole list i only has about 13 non-standard addresses, but overall i only got about 15 cards back so far, I didn't think that was too bad.

I was concerned about the response rate though, i only got 0.5%

Im prepared to mail for about 6 months straight, i just want to have some feedback on my postcard please

Was the green card a bad idea ?

Too wordy ?

[Michael Quarles]

try something like this in pink or yellow...