5 Stages of Grief with Short Sales

When you think about it, a person facing foreclosure goes thru the same 5 stages of grief as someone who has lost a loved one, divorce or some other loss.

When working with my sellers in a short sale, it is always helpful for me to identify which stage each seller I work with is in. 

The first stage is Denial.  So many people believe something will happen to get them out of the mess they are in.  They wait with their heads in the sand, hoping.  These are the folks I put in my call back file.  When I talk to them, I do try to help them to see exactly where they are, and to do something if they want to keep the house.  Hopefully, for their sake, they will look at their options before a foreclosure hits them with a 10 year credit prison sentence.

Anger.  Many people are angry, and rightfully so.  Their dream of owning a home and watching their investment grow and protect them is getting yanked out from under their feet.  They are getting refused for re-financing because their home has lost so much equity, no one will even consider them.  They do not make enough money for a loan mod.  Talking to the bank is like trying to make jello stick to a wall.  No one will listen, no one can help.  Except me, I will listen and help them avoid foreclosure with a short sale, if it is in their best interest.

Bargaining.  This is when the seller prays for a miracle, plays the lottery, or starts looking for a rich long lost relative. 

Depression.  This is where I feel for my sellers the most.  Having a degree in psychology, I feel I can help them through this phase, even if it is just to listen.  I do the best that I can for them with the time I get to spend with them. 

Acceptance.  Hooray.   The seller is ready for their new life and cannot wait to move on.  Sometimes this can be dangerous for the short sale, as the seller wants to be so far removed from this difficult situation, they may be hard to reach.  Luckily in every sale I have closed, the seller is good, decent, and holds up their part of the bargain.  Which is to show up and sign the closing docs!