I don’t know much about cash-out refi’s, so let me explain what I think I want to to do, and you all can tell me how misguided I am!

This is at the underwriters discretion so verifying with your lender ahead of time would be ideal. 

At the very minimum you'll want to verify that the QI is structuring the exchange according to the safe harbor in Rev Proc 2000-37 and provides an exchange agreement that verifies that. 

Regardless, you should still screen them like any other applicant and ensure and verify that they have an income source like any other applicant... because like many have mentioned, what happens on month 13?

So I cannot verify the integrity of their work.

I would give them no more than three days and call the utility company to verify.

How and who did you turn to to assist in analyzing what's right? 

I guess it just feels to me like I’m being asked to sign a pre-nup before even being asked to to marry him.

We do accept offer letters on letterhead followed up with a phone call verifying through employer.Criminal Background: Our qualification for criminal history is pretty strict.

Any pointers to to buy a MFH or SFH?