A Realtorese to English Translation Dictionary
After being involved in real estate for a while, it occurred to me the other day when I was talking to my sister that the words you are using may not mean what you think they mean to ordinary people.
Such as:
Cute = Tiny. See also cramped.
Retro = Super dated
Turn of the Century = check to see which century.
Country Paradise = Miles from nowhere. Also, probably has hideous wallpaper.
Urban Paradise = on top of a laundry or restaurant, next to the train tracks
Funky = Weirdest layout you've ever seen
Unique = see Funky
AS-IS = a wreck
Fixer Upper = a real wreck
Sweat Equity = barely standing
Bring Your Tool Belt = Do you have a really talented rehab team?
Perfect for Investors = Nobody else wants it. Investors are crazy, everybody knows that.
Current tenants want to stay = because their rent is so far below market it will make you cry.
Do Not Disturb Tenants = tenants think they are getting booted out.
What lingo have you heard that doesn't mean what others might think it means?