I need advice from a landlord whom is fair and not a slum lord

7 Replies

A landlord who allows her sons to enter the home without warning (once while I was showering, I woke to a snake under my bed and the walls and other areas full of nasty bedbugs that were there prior to my renting. I approached her and she evicted me. unfortunately I was stuck with nowhere else so I lived with it until her son sexually assaulted me. He got away with this so I fled the property nearly year ago. She and I are currently in a court battle. She's suing me and threatening that I drop charges against her son. Is this ok? Any advice? Bull crap cause I watched as a young mother (younger than myself) was mobing in last week. Should I warn them? I need advice please someone

Heather, sounds like the landlord is an unethical character.

You are describing criminal behavior ... why would you want advice from this forum? This situation requires legal counsel so you can make the best decision possible. You absolutely press charges against the son for the assault. It would be nice to find a way to give the young mother a "heads up" but be careful. However, I would definitely break off contact once you're in some legal battle with someone unless you're trying to work out something. I would be so far away from that place and people except for court matters.

Originally posted by @Heather Doe :

A landlord who allows her sons to enter the home without warning (once while I was showering, I woke to a snake under my bed and the walls and other areas full of nasty bedbugs that were there prior to my renting. I approached her and she evicted me. unfortunately I was stuck with nowhere else so I lived with it until her son sexually assaulted me. He got away with this so I fled the property nearly year ago. She and I are currently in a court battle. She’s suing me and threatening that I drop charges against her son. Is this ok? Any advice? Bull crap cause I watched as a young mother (younger than myself) was mobing in last week. Should I warn them? I need advice please someone 

 sorry.  sounds like you aren't having a good go of things. 

Advice is hard to give.  you've got alot going on here. 

1.  I would get really frugal & find a better place to live.  Plus you need to keep the place really really clean.  Take out the trash & keep trash can lids secured so you don't get raccoons.  bungee cords seem to work. Be preemptive with pest control.  Put out lots of Terro ant killer $10. dollar tree $1 for 4 Mouse snap traps baited with Peanut Butter.  Thankfully I don't know much about roach control (ne1 else chime in?)  they have glue traps which might have got the snake but glue traps are inhumane imo... Spending $20 on preventative pest control will really improve your life. 

2.  court cases many times come down to money.  I wouldn't let the court case consume you as best you can.  I'm not an attorney.   I would consult your attorney.  If you can't afford one is there a pro bono one that might provide some advice? i just wouldn't let this consume your life.  Move on & find happiness as best you can. 

3.  You might factually mention to new tenant that you had some issues & this is what happened.

4.  you might be the problem.  Every person typically thinks they are right.  But what if you brought the bed bugs in? Where did the snake under your bed come from?  If you get her son convicted, it could affect him for the rest of his life.  So as a mom your landlord might be willing to throw alot of resources/money attorney at keeping her son's record clean. 

Again these can be very complicated/dramatic issues. 

Good luck


The question is: should you tell the new young lady moving in?

No, you should not. It's not your job to run around telling every female in the world that he may be dangerous. Focus on your court battle and yourself.

This sounds like a Paul Harvey setup, really. Google "Paul Harvey" if the reference makes no sense :)

1. You approached the landlord with problems with bedbugs, snakes, and the son that walks in while you are showering so she evicted you. This makes no sense. Landlords - especially slumlords - almost never evict someone who is paying the rent in full, on time. I would guess that you were probably doing neither. Aside from that, the LL has to go to court to actually evict you, and you didn't mention an eviction proceeding.

2. You unfortunately had nowhere else to go so you lived with it. Makes no sense if she evicted you. I'm guessing instead of actually evicting you she told you "If you don't like it you can leave", which is not an eviction. In any case, having no place else to go is usually a grand lie or a massive embellishment. Few people exist on this earth in a vacuum - most have a mother, father, at least one friend, hell in the US there's even homeless shelters/battered women shelters/etc. Reality is it was inconvenient for you to go somewhere else, so you elected to stay in a place with bedbugs, snakes under the bed and uninvited intruders. Because I sure as hell would leave a place that had any of that, whether it was convenient or not. 

3. Son sexually assaulted you; I assume you called the police immediately and he was arrested? I'm guessing not - you said he "got away with it" so you fled (not sure what this means). This sounds like a legal issue that, if real, you need to pursue with some kind of attorney. Virtually all cities have pro bono legal counsel that you should avail yourself of if this really happened, as you would have some responsibility to do your best to prosecute a true sexual predator. If this really happened you should not drop charges against her son, and someone should be prosecuting the case. 

4. Should you "warn" the incoming tenant? I suppose if you want to take a chance on some kind of slander/libel suit. Otherwise you should just mind your business, which is your case against the son. 

@Heather Doe the first thing you need to know is you need legal representation. Any landlord giving you advice is going to be biased. Nothing against landlords (I am one) but we regularly get lied to by tenants, so this is why some people may be skeptical of some of your claims. If you cannot afford an attorney, you can find non-profit legal centers or tenant advocacy groups that will help you. Given that this cases involves sexual assault and retaliation by the landlord, you should have no trouble getting help. The prosecutor should be able to point you in the right direction for help with your civil case.

As far as your claim of being evicted, I think you may be misunderstanding the terminology. A landlord may service you a "Notice to Vacate" or "Notice to Cure or Quit" or "Eviction Notice". The title on the document may vary depending on the location and situation, but basically it is a letter delivered to you or posted on your door that asks you to fix a problem or leave the property. As others mentioned it is generally for rent non-payment. You made no comments on whether you were paying rent or not through all this, but that is an important detail. Keep in mind that receiving a notice is not eviction. If they evict the next step is getting notice to appear in court. If you appeared in court, that would be your chance to share your story about the snakes, bedbugs and the assault. The judge decides if an eviction is allowable and if so, they grant an eviction. If you are evicted, you cannot stay in a property. They give you a time period to leave and then you are removed by the police. If you don't show up in court, the landlord is usually granted a default judgement. That means they are granted the eviction and you will be physically removed. So when you state, you were evicted and stayed in the property, that doesn't make sense.

Regardless of whether you paid rent or were a good tenant, sexual assault is unacceptable. I am sorry that happened to you. Having a landlords son do this is even worse, because they are in a position of power over your living situation. Tell the prosecutor the victims advocate in the assault case that the landlord is trying to use civil courts to intimidate you. They can help you. 

I would really avoid getting advice here. You need to talk to legal professionals and I would seek out counseling for the assault.