Hi Alex,
You and I share a similar philosophy, which is always nice to come across in a fellow landlord and RE investor. It's unfortunate some of the less-than-amiable responses you've received, but unfortunately that's just how most people are in this "line of business." A landlord friend of mine is raising one tenant's rent from $1500 to $1800 at the end of their lease next month simply because other rentals in the area are going for between $1800 and $2000. To me, that's an absolutely insane hike all at once. I raised one of my tenant's rent by $50 with a 90 day notice ahead of time and still felt a bit bad about it since I had no need to actually raise rent outside of simply just increasing rent a little to keep up with inflation a bit and in case rent control is ever enacted and whatnot.
While the security deposit might be sizeable and surely may put a strain on a tenant's finances, I wouldn't recommend ever skipping out on having the security deposit and first month's rent paid in full prior to move in. This is the only guaranteed money that you'll have in your hand from the tenant, and you may need this to cover unpaid rent, utilities, or tenant-induced damages. Further, you don't want to waste your time with a potential tenant who can't put in the effort to save up the money necessary for the security deposit; a lack of this ability is a huge red flag in appropriate planning and financial skills, and that may become a problem that ultimately falls onto you as the landlord and property owner. Depending on the property's finances and neighborhood class, it may be helpful to only charge first month's rent and a security deposit upon move-in, rather than first, last, and deposit. This is what I typically do and haven't had any issues arise.
Also, just to expand on your example for potential rent prices: I hope you're not just going off the mortgage alone. I would recommend to include something for future maintenance and repairs into the cost as well. For example, your mortgage (PITI) might be $1,000... consider also $150 on top of that, set aside, for repairs/maintenance. That way, anything you charge for rent above the $1,150 would be pure cash flow, that you ideally shouldn't have to dip into for any fixes or maintenance. This is a practice I've done from the beginning, and has never done me wrong. It might eat into my cash flow numbers, but I sleep very comfortably knowing that I have maintenance and repairs accounted for if something should arise.
With that said, whether you're charging $1500, $1750, or $1900, it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things as long as (1) you've got a positive cash flow with decent padding, and; (2) you're comfortable and happy with that cash flow number. Not everyone invests the same, after all.
Best!