Using other loan types not only are non-conforming for you to occupy (DSCR), but the downpayment minimum and the rate will be much higher kind of defeating the purpose of doing a house-hack. 

I am definitely feeling kind of defeated in this market at this point.

This is a self defeating question and from the sounds of it you are already expecting failure. 

That defeats the whole purpose of the BRRRR strategy.  

Wells Fargo, BofA, Chase - none of them offer that because they need proof of registration with the secretary of state for each LLC, again defeating the purpose of the Series.

As far as I can tell there's no way I can defeat the redemption (short of buying the redemption rights for several times the auction price), but if I have to move out 2 days after I receive the papers I better start packing now!  

However, that defeats the purpose of insurance. 

The most important doors of which, were those pesky self defeating doors.

Beyond that, it'd be like hiring a general contractor for a remodel but hiring all the subs yourself - it defeats a huge purpose of hiring that person.

I'm also a wierdo and would of had to verfiy and research all the TK info...which kind of defeats the point and value of that service.