@Ford Smith
Many of us were in your shoes once. A little over 12 years ago, I was near homeless with a 500 credit score, medical bills out the wazoo, and working a $10/hr tech support job!
I can now say that I'm doing quite well for myself and am in the process of writing a book about my experiences to give people like yourself some insight into how to make it happen.
That said, there's hope. My advice would be that you should not focus yet on buying a home and instead focus on two "big picture" things:
- Increasing your income
- Decreasing your expenses
Sounds really simple - but people lose site of these two important concepts. If you aren't laser focused on these two, your other goals just won't be possible.
I tell people all the time: I can tell you how to get a six pack, but you have to do the work.
First of all, is it at all possible for you to get out of this sales role that has you're financial life in a roller coaster? Certainly you've got some skills that could help you land something with a consistent and strong base pay?
How long as your wife been in this HR position? Is it time to ask for a raise or look for another job where she can take on more responsibility and get paid more?
Have you run your credit report for both you and your wife to see what creditors you have that are driving your credit so far down (especially your wife?). Look at: https://www.creditkarma.com/
How much do you spend on housing currently? Is moving to a cheaper state an option? Remember that sometimes big results require big moves.
When I first started building credit, I had 3 - 4 medical bills in collections and they ranged from $50 to $250.
The first thing I did was dispute every. single. one. If a creditor cannot prove the debt, the collection will be removed from your credit report.
The second thing I did was call all of the collections agencies and I asked them to renegotiate my debt (NOT settle it as this will further adversely affect your credit). Make sure you say that you do not want to settle, but you want to know if you promised to pay $5 or $10 a month, would they be willing to forgive some portion of the debt?
Have you tried looking at sofi.com, prosper.com, lendingclub.com or other alternative financiers to see if there's an option for refinancing that student loan debt?
$180K is a lot of debt. I would consider speaking to a bankruptcy attorney to see what your options are there. They may be able to help you file bankruptcy or force the creditors to renegotiate the terms of the debt so that you have a better chance of paying it back.
Unfortunately, I don't think student loans can be written off in a bankruptcy at the moment - but it's worth looking into.
Have you setup a budget? Try mint.com and https://www.youneedabudget.com/. You need to be tracking and budgeting every single penny you two earn.
Once you have a handle on your budget and you have committed to the discipline of only spending what you earn, you can sign up for 1-2 secured credit cards and start using those for purchases you were already going to make in your budget.
Lastly, I also recommend joining the community and making a post over at: https://creditboards.com/forums/
There's a lot of smart people there that know tons of tricks to helping you build credit fast.
I hope this helps. YOU CAN DO IT.