So how are experienced investors actually doing it when they say they use both HML and PML money to fund deals with “no money out of pocket”? 

Save money so you can afford the down payment, closing costs, and holding costs. 

Stable, conservative & easily accessible during the interim.If you put in a Roth IRA, it becomes a lot harder to tap into..

I never used to be good in school, so learning about money, personal finance, credit, investing, etc. after getting out of school was a much better way to take learning more seriously as I am now responsible for what I do with my money & my potential future. 

.$900,000 appreciation if you are considering a 20% capital gains tax(or some hybrid between 15% capital gains tax and 25% depreciation recapture).With that said, if the property appreciated that much over a 4 year period, even if you lost money on cash flow, the appreciation more than made up for it.

One of the fastest ways to lose money in real estate is underwriting based on fantasy.

Since they want to spend no money on buildouts, fixtures, furnishings, etc, we will do that.  

Got a statement every month from a very reputable, conservative firm.

Sorry...way way too many questions for me.Every situation different.Probably not enough spread in most cosmetic flips....probably need the full meal deal.Also that cuts out much of your competition if you can handle more.Older and cheaper probably better depending on where you buy.Be ready to act quick, be conservative on your ARV and plan on about double whatever you think your time on market will be. 

A clean, realistic scope of work and conservative ARV will go a long way in getting a lender comfortable.The other big lesson is that certainty beats chasing the lowest rate.